Your Pain Isn't Your Purpose Anymore: Get Unstuck | Webinar

Hey everyone, welcome back to another Hey everyone, welcome back to another Hey everyone, welcome back to another episode of Integrative View. We have Dr. episode of Integrative View. We have Dr. episode of Integrative View. We have Dr. Nick here and uh he's going to really be Nick here and uh he's going to really be Nick here and uh he's going to really be taking the lead on this one because uh taking the lead on this one because uh taking the lead on this one because uh he's he's very passionate about this he's he's very passionate about this he's he's very passionate about this topic. But I'm going to just kind of topic. But I'm going to just kind of topic. But I'm going to just kind of give you an idea of what we're talking give you an idea of what we're talking give you an idea of what we're talking about and actually why it came about about and actually why it came about about and actually why it came about because a lot of these topics either because a lot of these topics either because a lot of these topics either come from deep conversations that Dr. come from deep conversations that Dr. come from deep conversations that Dr. Nick and I are having privately or it Nick and I are having privately or it Nick and I are having privately or it comes from working with our clients. And comes from working with our clients. And comes from working with our clients. And this one this one this one specifically came out of a value session specifically came out of a value session specifically came out of a value session that I was doing with one of our that I was doing with one of our that I was doing with one of our clients. And uh you know, we were deep clients. And uh you know, we were deep clients. And uh you know, we were deep in the conversation and I said, you in the conversation and I said, you in the conversation and I said, you know, I I want to ask you a question and know, I I want to ask you a question and know, I I want to ask you a question and I really want you to pause and think I really want you to pause and think I really want you to pause and think about it before you answer. And she is about it before you answer. And she is about it before you answer. And she is running a nonprofit. So, she running a nonprofit. So, she running a nonprofit. So, she essentially, you know, has her own essentially, you know, has her own essentially, you know, has her own business. And um she was talking a business. And um she was talking a business. And um she was talking a little bit about um you know, some of little bit about um you know, some of little bit about um you know, some of the situations that she feels like she the situations that she feels like she the situations that she feels like she gets in with with some of her her gets in with with some of her her gets in with with some of her her clients and conversations that unfold, clients and conversations that unfold, clients and conversations that unfold, the good parts, the you know, the parts the good parts, the you know, the parts the good parts, the you know, the parts that stress her out, etc. that stress her out, etc. that stress her out, etc. And I asked And I asked And I asked her, "Do you feel like her, "Do you feel like her, "Do you feel like your past health your past health your past health experience essentially an aspect of your experience essentially an aspect of your experience essentially an aspect of your suffering and your suffering and your suffering and your sickness makes you relatable to your sickness makes you relatable to your sickness makes you relatable to your clients?" Because essentially what she clients?" Because essentially what she clients?" Because essentially what she was telling me is that, you know, she was telling me is that, you know, she was telling me is that, you know, she ends up talking to individuals that are ends up talking to individuals that are ends up talking to individuals that are struggling with certain health ailments struggling with certain health ailments struggling with certain health ailments and she is able to connect with them in and she is able to connect with them in and she is able to connect with them in a very deep capacity because she knows a very deep capacity because she knows a very deep capacity because she knows what it's like to be in their shoes and what it's like to be in their shoes and what it's like to be in their shoes and she is able to then, you know, mentor she is able to then, you know, mentor she is able to then, you know, mentor them in order them in order them in order to try to get past to try to get past to try to get past it. And this was something as we were it. And this was something as we were it. And this was something as we were talking about it I could relate to very talking about it I could relate to very talking about it I could relate to very much. And I asked her this question much. And I asked her this question much. And I asked her this question primarily primarily primarily because we get to a place where we are because we get to a place where we are because we get to a place where we are we've we've leveraged what we know. we've we've leveraged what we know. we've we've leveraged what we know. We've leveraged our experiences, the We've leveraged our experiences, the We've leveraged our experiences, the good and the bad, and we've allowed it good and the bad, and we've allowed it good and the bad, and we've allowed it to create something for ourselves. Let's to create something for ourselves. Let's to create something for ourselves. Let's call it a certain level of success. And then we start to feel a success. And then we start to feel a success. And then we start to feel a little imbalanced, start to feel like, little imbalanced, start to feel like, little imbalanced, start to feel like, is this it? You know, like, is this is this it? You know, like, is this is this it? You know, like, is this really what I really what I really what I want? want? want? And we don't really know how to And we don't really know how to And we don't really know how to interpret what we're feeling. we're just interpret what we're feeling. we're just interpret what we're feeling. we're just calling it a feeling and we think, "Oh, calling it a feeling and we think, "Oh, calling it a feeling and we think, "Oh, it'll just pass." But it doesn't pass. it'll just pass." But it doesn't pass. it'll just pass." But it doesn't pass. And so essentially, she leveraged her And so essentially, she leveraged her And so essentially, she leveraged her health adversities to create this health adversities to create this health adversities to create this business, to create clientele, to business, to create clientele, to business, to create clientele, to connect with certain people, to build a connect with certain people, to build a connect with certain people, to build a certain level of certain level of certain level of success. And then she started to feel success. And then she started to feel success. And then she started to feel like everyone was coming to her. It was like everyone was coming to her. It was like everyone was coming to her. It was an unfair exchange. an unfair exchange. an unfair exchange. And there was a lot of victim doom and And there was a lot of victim doom and And there was a lot of victim doom and gloom conversations that were honestly gloom conversations that were honestly gloom conversations that were honestly starting to affect her in her personal starting to affect her in her personal starting to affect her in her personal life because it was very life because it was very life because it was very draining. And again, I relate it very draining. And again, I relate it very draining. And again, I relate it very much. And I said, you know, has it much. And I said, you know, has it much. And I said, you know, has it really occurred to you that potentially really occurred to you that potentially really occurred to you that potentially your previous health your previous health your previous health adversity is been making you relatable? adversity is been making you relatable? adversity is been making you relatable? and she kind of like paused and had a and she kind of like paused and had a and she kind of like paused and had a holy [  ] moment. And I'm like, now you holy [  ] moment. And I'm like, now you holy [  ] moment. And I'm like, now you have to ask yourself the question of is have to ask yourself the question of is have to ask yourself the question of is that what I want to continue to that what I want to continue to that what I want to continue to happen happen happen or do I want to actually be looked at as or do I want to actually be looked at as or do I want to actually be looked at as the victor, not the victim of my the victor, not the victim of my the victor, not the victim of my circumstance, but the victor to my old circumstance, but the victor to my old circumstance, but the victor to my old health health health adversities. And now I help you go from adversities. And now I help you go from adversities. And now I help you go from victim to victor. I don't know where to start right now. I don't know where to start right now. I don't know where to start right now. Well, I I think that we can what I I Well, I I think that we can what I I Well, I I think that we can what I I would love to hear your your thoughts on would love to hear your your thoughts on would love to hear your your thoughts on this because and and some people might this because and and some people might this because and and some people might get triggered by this idea because no get triggered by this idea because no get triggered by this idea because no one wants to think of themselves as a one wants to think of themselves as a one wants to think of themselves as a victim, but we have to be honest with victim, but we have to be honest with victim, but we have to be honest with ourselves when we're frustrated, we're ourselves when we're frustrated, we're ourselves when we're frustrated, we're overwhelmed, we're we're not, you know, overwhelmed, we're we're not, you know, overwhelmed, we're we're not, you know, happy in the moment. And, you know, we happy in the moment. And, you know, we happy in the moment. And, you know, we all kind of do it. We feel all kind of do it. We feel all kind of do it. We feel like this is happening to me, etc., like this is happening to me, etc., like this is happening to me, etc., etc., which is a victim mentality. And etc., which is a victim mentality. And etc., which is a victim mentality. And that's not to get down on yourself about that's not to get down on yourself about that's not to get down on yourself about it. And we tend to attract more of these it. And we tend to attract more of these it. And we tend to attract more of these conversations with other people that are conversations with other people that are conversations with other people that are also in a victim also in a victim also in a victim mentality. But like, exactly. And you mentality. But like, exactly. And you mentality. But like, exactly. And you know, I got to a certain point in my know, I got to a certain point in my know, I got to a certain point in my career that I was so [  ] drained career that I was so [  ] drained career that I was so [  ] drained from that. And I and I didn't know how from that. And I and I didn't know how from that. And I and I didn't know how to process it. I didn't know what to do. to process it. I didn't know what to do. to process it. I didn't know what to do. And I realized it took a while and it And I realized it took a while and it And I realized it took a while and it took your help, but I realized that it's took your help, but I realized that it's took your help, but I realized that it's not that I wanted nothing to do with the not that I wanted nothing to do with the not that I wanted nothing to do with the victim mentality. I wanted the person victim mentality. I wanted the person victim mentality. I wanted the person that was maybe like, I feel like a that was maybe like, I feel like a that was maybe like, I feel like a victim to my situation right now. I victim to my situation right now. I victim to my situation right now. I don't understand it. I don't have the don't understand it. I don't have the don't understand it. I don't have the data. I don't know what's wrong with me. data. I don't know what's wrong with me. data. I don't know what's wrong with me. But at the end of the day, the deeper But at the end of the day, the deeper But at the end of the day, the deeper want, the deeper desire was to be the want, the deeper desire was to be the want, the deeper desire was to be the victor, to overcome it. And once I had victor, to overcome it. And once I had victor, to overcome it. And once I had that knowledge, I was able to be very that knowledge, I was able to be very that knowledge, I was able to be very specific in who I could work with specific in who I could work with specific in who I could work with successfully and who it was not going to successfully and who it was not going to successfully and who it was not going to be a successful exchange because they be a successful exchange because they be a successful exchange because they were they were were they were were they were leveraging their their victim leveraging their their victim leveraging their their victim situation. And I think that's what you situation. And I think that's what you situation. And I think that's what you need to talk about is when you leverage need to talk about is when you leverage need to talk about is when you leverage your circumstances your circumstances your circumstances because you can. I want to start out with one thing I want to start out with one thing I want to start out with one thing that's um highly important that a lot of that's um highly important that a lot of that's um highly important that a lot of people don't talk about is it's first people don't talk about is it's first people don't talk about is it's first acknowledging that you're you're holding acknowledging that you're you're holding acknowledging that you're you're holding on to these things because it's on to these things because it's on to these things because it's benefiting you. and you get to the point benefiting you. and you get to the point benefiting you. and you get to the point where you know is this it hence now it's where you know is this it hence now it's where you know is this it hence now it's not benefiting you as much but initially not benefiting you as much but initially not benefiting you as much but initially that you know back to the story you that you know back to the story you that you know back to the story you talked about is being relatable having talked about is being relatable having talked about is being relatable having that connection well if if I don't have that connection well if if I don't have that connection well if if I don't have this sickness then I'm not going to have this sickness then I'm not going to have this sickness then I'm not going to have that connection I'm not going to be as that connection I'm not going to be as that connection I'm not going to be as relatable so it was a tool and it was a relatable so it was a tool and it was a relatable so it was a tool and it was a great tool and it served you and it great tool and it served you and it great tool and it served you and it served other people and it's being able served other people and it's being able served other people and it's being able to whatever what whatever the pain point to whatever what whatever the pain point to whatever what whatever the pain point is Whatever the suffering is, it's to is Whatever the suffering is, it's to is Whatever the suffering is, it's to acknowledge acknowledge acknowledge that it was good. It wasn't just all that it was good. It wasn't just all that it was good. It wasn't just all bad. There was good to it and that you bad. There was good to it and that you bad. There was good to it and that you used it. And that takes you up to a used it. And that takes you up to a used it. And that takes you up to a certain degree of suffering. And what's certain degree of suffering. And what's certain degree of suffering. And what's interesting is, you know, our voids interesting is, you know, our voids interesting is, you know, our voids create our values, but a lot of our pain create our values, but a lot of our pain create our values, but a lot of our pain points and our suffering, our biggest points and our suffering, our biggest points and our suffering, our biggest suffering creates what we're most suffering creates what we're most suffering creates what we're most passionate about. passionate about. passionate about. But when you really study, hence one of But when you really study, hence one of But when you really study, hence one of our previous podcasts we talked about our previous podcasts we talked about our previous podcasts we talked about you want to have a coach, you want to you want to have a coach, you want to you want to have a coach, you want to have a mentor that has more awareness have a mentor that has more awareness have a mentor that has more awareness than than than you. Suffering is the root of passion. you. Suffering is the root of passion. you. Suffering is the root of passion. So what you're passionate about, your So what you're passionate about, your So what you're passionate about, your passion is created from your suffering. passion is created from your suffering. passion is created from your suffering. We we don't want to live and work and be We we don't want to live and work and be We we don't want to live and work and be in a state of passion because that's in a state of passion because that's in a state of passion because that's that has like as you mentioned that has that has like as you mentioned that has that has like as you mentioned that has the ball and chain the shackles holding the ball and chain the shackles holding the ball and chain the shackles holding you back to your suffering. We we want you back to your suffering. We we want you back to your suffering. We we want to overcome our suffering. We want to to overcome our suffering. We want to to overcome our suffering. We want to step above being passion and into being step above being passion and into being step above being passion and into being inspired. And when we're inspired, we're inspired. And when we're inspired, we're inspired. And when we're inspired, we're in we're grounded in selflove. And we in we're grounded in selflove. And we in we're grounded in selflove. And we can't give something we don't have. So can't give something we don't have. So can't give something we don't have. So you have to learn how to overcome your you have to learn how to overcome your you have to learn how to overcome your passions. You have to overcome your passions. You have to overcome your passions. You have to overcome your suffering. And then that's when healing suffering. And then that's when healing suffering. And then that's when healing uh really occurs is when you're grateful uh really occurs is when you're grateful uh really occurs is when you're grateful for those things in the past and hence for those things in the past and hence for those things in the past and hence you can use those now leverage that you can use those now leverage that you can use those now leverage that information have more awareness to make information have more awareness to make information have more awareness to make better decisions to serve you. And a lot better decisions to serve you. And a lot better decisions to serve you. And a lot of those in this case health adversities of those in this case health adversities of those in this case health adversities you know we we judge that for happening you know we we judge that for happening you know we we judge that for happening but you know you look you look at energy but you know you look you look at energy but you know you look you look at energy and energy is you know for every action and energy is you know for every action and energy is you know for every action there's an equal and opposite reaction. there's an equal and opposite reaction. there's an equal and opposite reaction. So we we want the pleasures of life So we we want the pleasures of life So we we want the pleasures of life without the pain but it's actually the without the pain but it's actually the without the pain but it's actually the pain that creates the pleasure. pain that creates the pleasure. pain that creates the pleasure. So we have to go through these painful So we have to go through these painful So we have to go through these painful points whether it's a health issue, points whether it's a health issue, points whether it's a health issue, whether it's a mental issue, you know, whether it's a mental issue, you know, whether it's a mental issue, you know, it could be a divorce, could be it could be a divorce, could be it could be a divorce, could be bankruptcy, it could be whatever it is, bankruptcy, it could be whatever it is, bankruptcy, it could be whatever it is, a loss. We have to go through those pain a loss. We have to go through those pain a loss. We have to go through those pain points and that initially creates points and that initially creates points and that initially creates suffering. But then it's our job through suffering. But then it's our job through suffering. But then it's our job through increased awareness to go back and increased awareness to go back and increased awareness to go back and balance out the good and the bad within balance out the good and the bad within balance out the good and the bad within those pain points. When we do that, those pain points. When we do that, those pain points. When we do that, there's no more suffering. suffering is there's no more suffering. suffering is there's no more suffering. suffering is literally just uh a a creation from an literally just uh a a creation from an literally just uh a a creation from an imbalanced perspective. So once you can imbalanced perspective. So once you can imbalanced perspective. So once you can go back and balance out the perspective go back and balance out the perspective go back and balance out the perspective out there's no more suffering. You have out there's no more suffering. You have out there's no more suffering. You have a greater level of consciousness and a greater level of consciousness and a greater level of consciousness and awareness to be able to use that initial awareness to be able to use that initial awareness to be able to use that initial circumstance to leverage that and to circumstance to leverage that and to circumstance to leverage that and to what serving what's most important to what serving what's most important to what serving what's most important to you. And that's when life gets really you. And that's when life gets really you. And that's when life gets really joyful and fun. joyful and fun. joyful and fun. Well, based on what you just said, I Well, based on what you just said, I Well, based on what you just said, I think initially sometimes it's really think initially sometimes it's really think initially sometimes it's really hard for people to understand the um how hard for people to understand the um how hard for people to understand the um how suffering can can serve them. And I suffering can can serve them. And I suffering can can serve them. And I think that the the phrase that helped me think that the the phrase that helped me think that the the phrase that helped me a lot in in that understanding was the a lot in in that understanding was the a lot in in that understanding was the idea of like rejection to redirection. idea of like rejection to redirection. idea of like rejection to redirection. And you know there rejection I think And you know there rejection I think And you know there rejection I think across the board if you if you talk across the board if you if you talk across the board if you if you talk about rejection and that could be about rejection and that could be about rejection and that could be rejection from a job, rejection from a rejection from a job, rejection from a rejection from a job, rejection from a partner, rejection from a friend, partner, rejection from a friend, partner, rejection from a friend, rejection from family. Most people are rejection from family. Most people are rejection from family. Most people are going to unanimously say rejection going to unanimously say rejection going to unanimously say rejection sucks. Rejection is painful. Rejection sucks. Rejection is painful. Rejection sucks. Rejection is painful. Rejection is suffering. And really when you look is suffering. And really when you look is suffering. And really when you look at rejection, it's a redirection. And so at rejection, it's a redirection. And so at rejection, it's a redirection. And so you can you're getting redirected no you can you're getting redirected no you can you're getting redirected no matter what. And if you either you could matter what. And if you either you could matter what. And if you either you could surrender and lean into that redirection surrender and lean into that redirection surrender and lean into that redirection because there's a higher source that's because there's a higher source that's because there's a higher source that's telling you exactly what you need or or telling you exactly what you need or or telling you exactly what you need or or showcasing the way or you can fight it showcasing the way or you can fight it showcasing the way or you can fight it tooth and nail and potentially tooth and nail and potentially tooth and nail and potentially perpetuate your suffering. And so I love perpetuate your suffering. And so I love perpetuate your suffering. And so I love the that phrase because when something the that phrase because when something the that phrase because when something still to this day, you know, it feels still to this day, you know, it feels still to this day, you know, it feels like a like a like a rejection. I'm always rejection. I'm always rejection. I'm always like, where am I being redirected? I'm like, where am I being redirected? I'm like, where am I being redirected? I'm not I'm not going to I'm going to not I'm not going to I'm going to not I'm not going to I'm going to surrender surrender surrender to something guiding me to something to something guiding me to something to something guiding me to something better. Yeah. And when you think about better. Yeah. And when you think about better. Yeah. And when you think about like failures, quote unquote re like failures, quote unquote re like failures, quote unquote re rejections, it's those things happen rejections, it's those things happen rejections, it's those things happen because we think that's what was going because we think that's what was going because we think that's what was going to best serve us, but we have blinders to best serve us, but we have blinders to best serve us, but we have blinders on. We're like the horses going through on. We're like the horses going through on. We're like the horses going through and we can't see all these other and we can't see all these other and we can't see all these other possibilities that are actually better possibilities that are actually better possibilities that are actually better for us. So, you know, rejection hurts, for us. So, you know, rejection hurts, for us. So, you know, rejection hurts, but it's it's actually occurring because but it's it's actually occurring because but it's it's actually occurring because we could have gone down that pathway, we could have gone down that pathway, we could have gone down that pathway, but it would have wasted a lot of time, but it would have wasted a lot of time, but it would have wasted a lot of time, energy, money, resources, etc. And at energy, money, resources, etc. And at energy, money, resources, etc. And at the end of the day, we would have had a the end of the day, we would have had a the end of the day, we would have had a bigger pain point from creating a bigger bigger pain point from creating a bigger bigger pain point from creating a bigger snowball, putting all that time and snowball, putting all that time and snowball, putting all that time and energy into it, and then having to energy into it, and then having to energy into it, and then having to redirect after that. So, you know, the redirect after that. So, you know, the redirect after that. So, you know, the the redirection I always look at it as the redirection I always look at it as the redirection I always look at it as like, you know, if a door is closing, like, you know, if a door is closing, like, you know, if a door is closing, well, in that exact same moment, there's well, in that exact same moment, there's well, in that exact same moment, there's an equal and opposite. So, there's a an equal and opposite. So, there's a an equal and opposite. So, there's a door opening. And if the door shut, it door opening. And if the door shut, it door opening. And if the door shut, it was because that wasn't the right door was because that wasn't the right door was because that wasn't the right door for you to be in in that moment. And we for you to be in in that moment. And we for you to be in in that moment. And we tend as a society focus, you know, cuz tend as a society focus, you know, cuz tend as a society focus, you know, cuz we feel it. And our awareness, our we feel it. And our awareness, our we feel it. And our awareness, our consciousness tends to go towards what consciousness tends to go towards what consciousness tends to go towards what we feel. So it's it takes a little bit we feel. So it's it takes a little bit we feel. So it's it takes a little bit of time and practice but once you can of time and practice but once you can of time and practice but once you can actually um strengthen the mind to be actually um strengthen the mind to be actually um strengthen the mind to be able to step out of the pain to able to step out of the pain to able to step out of the pain to disconnect from that and then search for disconnect from that and then search for disconnect from that and then search for that open that open that open door. That's when the magic really door. That's when the magic really door. That's when the magic really happens because that's when you're happens because that's when you're happens because that's when you're actually re able to receive. You know, actually re able to receive. You know, actually re able to receive. You know, it's kind of like the story that, you it's kind of like the story that, you it's kind of like the story that, you know, you're always knocking on God's know, you're always knocking on God's know, you're always knocking on God's door, but he's not opening. Well, it's door, but he's not opening. Well, it's door, but he's not opening. Well, it's it's like you could be knocking on the it's like you could be knocking on the it's like you could be knocking on the wrong door, man. wrong door, man. wrong door, man. So, so step back and it makes me think So, so step back and it makes me think So, so step back and it makes me think of um I thought of myself first, but of um I thought of myself first, but of um I thought of myself first, but people that want to control, you know, people that want to control, you know, people that want to control, you know, that the idea of of control and and that the idea of of control and and that the idea of of control and and people that call themselves, you know, people that call themselves, you know, people that call themselves, you know, control freaks or they're always trying control freaks or they're always trying control freaks or they're always trying to control outcomes. Like what you just to control outcomes. Like what you just to control outcomes. Like what you just said is so significant to the downsides said is so significant to the downsides said is so significant to the downsides of control because most people that are of control because most people that are of control because most people that are trying to control everything in their trying to control everything in their trying to control everything in their house, in their family, in their house, in their family, in their house, in their family, in their business, in their lives, you know, one, business, in their lives, you know, one, business, in their lives, you know, one, they're so [  ] anxious, you know, they're so [  ] anxious, you know, they're so [  ] anxious, you know, stressed stressed stressed in your lower ego. Well, yes. And e ego in your lower ego. Well, yes. And e ego in your lower ego. Well, yes. And e ego doesn't want to die. So, but it's I doesn't want to die. So, but it's I doesn't want to die. So, but it's I tried to control so many things and as tried to control so many things and as tried to control so many things and as you said before is you have the blinders you said before is you have the blinders you said before is you have the blinders on. You're trying to control thinking on. You're trying to control thinking on. You're trying to control thinking this is the exact way this should go. this is the exact way this should go. this is the exact way this should go. This is the best route, but you can't This is the best route, but you can't This is the best route, but you can't see what you can't see. And it creates see what you can't see. And it creates see what you can't see. And it creates pain. It creates suffering. It creates a pain. It creates suffering. It creates a pain. It creates suffering. It creates a lot of wasted [  ] time, wasted lot of wasted [  ] time, wasted lot of wasted [  ] time, wasted energy, wasted resources, money, and you energy, wasted resources, money, and you energy, wasted resources, money, and you know, that was the story of my life for know, that was the story of my life for know, that was the story of my life for for so many years. And and especially for so many years. And and especially for so many years. And and especially when it comes to like the pain of time, when it comes to like the pain of time, when it comes to like the pain of time, energy, and money loss. When you're energy, and money loss. When you're energy, and money loss. When you're running a business, when you're running running a business, when you're running running a business, when you're running a big business and you're trying to a big business and you're trying to a big business and you're trying to control everything and it's like do this control everything and it's like do this control everything and it's like do this and do this, do this and it's like the and do this, do this and it's like the and do this, do this and it's like the whack-a-mole whack-a-mole whack-a-mole game, you know, you can sit back and be game, you know, you can sit back and be game, you know, you can sit back and be like, "Holy crap, I feel like I have like, "Holy crap, I feel like I have like, "Holy crap, I feel like I have been grinding, working, you know, been grinding, working, you know, been grinding, working, you know, expending so much of my energy and time, expending so much of my energy and time, expending so much of my energy and time, and I feel like the hamster on the and I feel like the hamster on the and I feel like the hamster on the wheel, and I've actually lost a [  ] ton wheel, and I've actually lost a [  ] ton wheel, and I've actually lost a [  ] ton of money in the process. like, ooh, this of money in the process. like, ooh, this of money in the process. like, ooh, this sucks. sucks. sucks. That's perfect because that that That's perfect because that that That's perfect because that that literally just goes back to what we were literally just goes back to what we were literally just goes back to what we were just talking about is, you know, going just talking about is, you know, going just talking about is, you know, going back to these these struggles, these back to these these struggles, these back to these these struggles, these pain points. And initially, um, if you pain points. And initially, um, if you pain points. And initially, um, if you know, we had the time, we could go back know, we had the time, we could go back know, we had the time, we could go back and and see you taking control over and and see you taking control over and and see you taking control over things and not having other people things and not having other people things and not having other people control them benefited you. But then you control them benefited you. But then you control them benefited you. But then you relied and you held on that control too relied and you held on that control too relied and you held on that control too much and that led much and that led much and that led into actually not control that that into actually not control that that into actually not control that that developed into an attachment issue and developed into an attachment issue and developed into an attachment issue and you had an attachment to how things you had an attachment to how things you had an attachment to how things needed to be done to be able to get the needed to be done to be able to get the needed to be done to be able to get the results that you wanted to achieve. But results that you wanted to achieve. But results that you wanted to achieve. But when you really realize that every when you really realize that every when you really realize that every single person is unique and has their single person is unique and has their single person is unique and has their own zone of genius that somebody else own zone of genius that somebody else own zone of genius that somebody else could if you let go of some of that could if you let go of some of that could if you let go of some of that control so that it was actually in a control so that it was actually in a control so that it was actually in a state of balance and then you allowed state of balance and then you allowed state of balance and then you allowed that person to use their zone of genius, that person to use their zone of genius, that person to use their zone of genius, they could probably receive and achieve they could probably receive and achieve they could probably receive and achieve those results even quicker than you. it. those results even quicker than you. it. those results even quicker than you. it. But the journey to that would be But the journey to that would be But the journey to that would be uncomfortable because you had an uncomfortable because you had an uncomfortable because you had an attachment to how that was supposed to attachment to how that was supposed to attachment to how that was supposed to look instead of just having quote look instead of just having quote look instead of just having quote unquote the faith that it was going to unquote the faith that it was going to unquote the faith that it was going to get done the way eventually it needed to get done the way eventually it needed to get done the way eventually it needed to be achieved. be achieved. be achieved. This is why uh frontline employees in This is why uh frontline employees in This is why uh frontline employees in big companies, they think that, you big companies, they think that, you big companies, they think that, you know, the CEOs just have it made and you know, the CEOs just have it made and you know, the CEOs just have it made and you know, they're they're just because they know, they're they're just because they know, they're they're just because they like a really really good CEO that is like a really really good CEO that is like a really really good CEO that is not trying to control that is is not trying to control that is is not trying to control that is is actually leveraging a lot of the things actually leveraging a lot of the things actually leveraging a lot of the things that we're talking about here. you know, that we're talking about here. you know, that we're talking about here. you know, they look so chill, calm, and collected they look so chill, calm, and collected they look so chill, calm, and collected on the on the surface because they're on the on the surface because they're on the on the surface because they're they're they're they're trusting the process, but well, they trusting the process, but well, they trusting the process, but well, they also hire a team players. I mean, yes, also hire a team players. I mean, yes, also hire a team players. I mean, yes, of course, there's multi it's of course, there's multi it's of course, there's multi it's multifaceted, but they're just multifaceted, but they're just multifaceted, but they're just constantly thinking and reflecting and constantly thinking and reflecting and constantly thinking and reflecting and and and trusting, you know, where and and trusting, you know, where and and trusting, you know, where they're being they're being they're being redirected opposed to the that's not redirected opposed to the that's not redirected opposed to the that's not supposed to happen this way. control supposed to happen this way. control supposed to happen this way. control control. So it's a very interesting control. So it's a very interesting control. So it's a very interesting thing about this idea that I want to go thing about this idea that I want to go thing about this idea that I want to go back to from what you were just saying back to from what you were just saying back to from what you were just saying is suffering creating your is suffering creating your is suffering creating your passion and then passion and then passion and then passion because it's rooted in the passion because it's rooted in the passion because it's rooted in the suffering essentially results in a suffering essentially results in a suffering essentially results in a plateau and then it's a really an plateau and then it's a really an plateau and then it's a really an invitation to invitation to invitation to inspiration. And I want to just kind of inspiration. And I want to just kind of inspiration. And I want to just kind of like break this down for people to like break this down for people to like break this down for people to really really absorb it really really absorb it really really absorb it because this is so significant and so because this is so significant and so because this is so significant and so important. Especially if you are a important. Especially if you are a important. Especially if you are a person that is committed to your own person that is committed to your own person that is committed to your own personal growth. You're committed to personal growth. You're committed to personal growth. You're committed to even better for your life, for your even better for your life, for your even better for your life, for your business, for your family. business, for your family. business, for your family. And one I I want you to know that it And one I I want you to know that it And one I I want you to know that it it's okay to hit that plateau. It's just it's okay to hit that plateau. It's just it's okay to hit that plateau. It's just an an an invitation in order to surpass it. And invitation in order to surpass it. And invitation in order to surpass it. And you know, and and don't sit there and go you know, and and don't sit there and go you know, and and don't sit there and go into that analytical mind and say, "But into that analytical mind and say, "But into that analytical mind and say, "But on paper, my life is good and so like I on paper, my life is good and so like I on paper, my life is good and so like I should be happier." should be happier." should be happier." If you don't feel fully aligned or If you don't feel fully aligned or If you don't feel fully aligned or something feels off, even if you can't something feels off, even if you can't something feels off, even if you can't fully articulate what that is, that's fully articulate what that is, that's fully articulate what that is, that's the the the invitation to to go more into invitation to to go more into invitation to to go more into inspiration in your life because exactly inspiration in your life because exactly inspiration in your life because exactly what you said, Dr. Nick is you know what you said, Dr. Nick is you know what you said, Dr. Nick is you know there are a lot of things that we there are a lot of things that we there are a lot of things that we experience as children um you know in experience as children um you know in experience as children um you know in our developmental years that creates a our developmental years that creates a our developmental years that creates a certain level of pain a certain level of certain level of pain a certain level of certain level of pain a certain level of adversity and a lot of us can use that adversity and a lot of us can use that adversity and a lot of us can use that like I know that I used it and it's one like I know that I used it and it's one like I know that I used it and it's one of the reasons why I became an of the reasons why I became an of the reasons why I became an entrepreneur it's one of the reasons why entrepreneur it's one of the reasons why entrepreneur it's one of the reasons why I had no fear of failure because having I had no fear of failure because having I had no fear of failure because having the same life that I observed around the same life that I observed around the same life that I observed around me povertystricken victim life that was me povertystricken victim life that was me povertystricken victim life that was way [  ] scarier than than making way [  ] scarier than than making way [  ] scarier than than making risky business moves. It so I was like I risky business moves. It so I was like I risky business moves. It so I was like I I used it. I used it and then you I used it. I used it and then you I used it. I used it and then you obviously saw it firsthand is on paper obviously saw it firsthand is on paper obviously saw it firsthand is on paper had the office had the business had XYZ had the office had the business had XYZ had the office had the business had XYZ you know that people could say life you know that people could say life you know that people could say life looks good for Nicole and then looks good for Nicole and then looks good for Nicole and then internally it was like something is off internally it was like something is off internally it was like something is off something doesn't feel right I'm being something doesn't feel right I'm being something doesn't feel right I'm being called for more I don't know what it is called for more I don't know what it is called for more I don't know what it is I don't know what this means and it was I don't know what this means and it was I don't know what this means and it was the it was the feedback mechanism to say the it was the feedback mechanism to say the it was the feedback mechanism to say you exhausted you exhausted you exhausted this. You exhausted this. You you had this. You exhausted this. You you had this. You exhausted this. You you had your suffering. You turned it into your suffering. You turned it into your suffering. You turned it into passion. You turned it into a passion. You turned it into a passion. You turned it into a mission. And now you have an invitation mission. And now you have an invitation mission. And now you have an invitation to take your life up a notch and to now to take your life up a notch and to now to take your life up a notch and to now live a life that's more rooted in your live a life that's more rooted in your live a life that's more rooted in your values, that's more values, that's more values, that's more inspiring. And you could tell me if you inspiring. And you could tell me if you inspiring. And you could tell me if you agree, but the way that I think about agree, but the way that I think about agree, but the way that I think about this is when you you stop making this is when you you stop making this is when you you stop making decisions out of desperation, the have decisions out of desperation, the have decisions out of desperation, the have to, the need to or shoulds, and you to, the need to or shoulds, and you to, the need to or shoulds, and you start to make decisions out of start to make decisions out of start to make decisions out of inspiration. Um, 100%. Honestly, I'll I'll just Um, 100%. Honestly, I'll I'll just Um, 100%. Honestly, I'll I'll just explain it in a slightly different way explain it in a slightly different way explain it in a slightly different way is that the cuz your passion is coming is that the cuz your passion is coming is that the cuz your passion is coming from your past pain points and from your past pain points and from your past pain points and suffering. If you're constantly making suffering. If you're constantly making suffering. If you're constantly making decisions and actions that are connected decisions and actions that are connected decisions and actions that are connected with that, well, you're tied back to with that, well, you're tied back to with that, well, you're tied back to that. You're always going to be held that. You're always going to be held that. You're always going to be held back because that's your foundation. But back because that's your foundation. But back because that's your foundation. But intuition and inspiration, that's all intuition and inspiration, that's all intuition and inspiration, that's all connected with uh the Greek um word connected with uh the Greek um word connected with uh the Greek um word telos. You know, just in your DNA, you telos. You know, just in your DNA, you telos. You know, just in your DNA, you have telomeres, which is the endpoint on have telomeres, which is the endpoint on have telomeres, which is the endpoint on your DNA, which has your genetic age, your DNA, which has your genetic age, your DNA, which has your genetic age, not your biological age, but your not your biological age, but your not your biological age, but your genetic age. So somebody could be, you genetic age. So somebody could be, you genetic age. So somebody could be, you know, 50 years old but have a genetic know, 50 years old but have a genetic know, 50 years old but have a genetic age of 30 and somebody could be 50 years age of 30 and somebody could be 50 years age of 30 and somebody could be 50 years old and have a genetic age of 70. So you old and have a genetic age of 70. So you old and have a genetic age of 70. So you it's the end point. But that's what it's the end point. But that's what it's the end point. But that's what Telos is, is with the end in mind. So Telos is, is with the end in mind. So Telos is, is with the end in mind. So when you look at being when you look at being when you look at being inspired, you're looking at the end of inspired, you're looking at the end of inspired, you're looking at the end of your life, the legacy you want to live. your life, the legacy you want to live. your life, the legacy you want to live. And that's a completely different And that's a completely different And that's a completely different connection than your connection with connection than your connection with connection than your connection with your passion. your passion. your passion. You're suffering. You're suffering. You're suffering. You're suffering. You're suffering. You're suffering. Yeah. No, Yeah. No, Yeah. No, it's and and for someone who's looking it's and and for someone who's looking it's and and for someone who's looking for the practical application of this for the practical application of this for the practical application of this and and I know that if you are an Advid and and I know that if you are an Advid and and I know that if you are an Advid listener here, you've heard me say this listener here, you've heard me say this listener here, you've heard me say this in different ways on on different in different ways on on different in different ways on on different podcasts, but you know, when we are podcasts, but you know, when we are podcasts, but you know, when we are still rooted in in leveraging our our still rooted in in leveraging our our still rooted in in leveraging our our past pain, our past adversity, our past past pain, our past adversity, our past past pain, our past adversity, our past suffering, and we tend to make more suffering, and we tend to make more suffering, and we tend to make more decisions out of desperation. And so, decisions out of desperation. And so, decisions out of desperation. And so, you know, what what does this really you know, what what does this really you know, what what does this really look like? It's when you have an look like? It's when you have an look like? It's when you have an intuitive feeling to say, uh, I'm not intuitive feeling to say, uh, I'm not intuitive feeling to say, uh, I'm not sure. I'm not sure about this person. sure. I'm not sure about this person. sure. I'm not sure about this person. I'm not sure about this job. I'm not I'm not sure about this job. I'm not I'm not sure about this job. I'm not sure about this business move. I'm not sure about this business move. I'm not sure about this business move. I'm not sure. It just something doesn't sink sure. It just something doesn't sink sure. It just something doesn't sink 100%. It doesn't feel exciting or 100%. It doesn't feel exciting or 100%. It doesn't feel exciting or inspiring. And so, now you go to the inspiring. And so, now you go to the inspiring. And so, now you go to the drawing board of your pros and cons list drawing board of your pros and cons list drawing board of your pros and cons list and you you look at everything. and you and you you look at everything. and you and you you look at everything. and you go into your analytical mind of like, go into your analytical mind of like, go into your analytical mind of like, well, okay, you know, like let's use a well, okay, you know, like let's use a well, okay, you know, like let's use a uh a romantic partner as an example. uh a romantic partner as an example. uh a romantic partner as an example. It's okay. Well, well, he's nice. I like It's okay. Well, well, he's nice. I like It's okay. Well, well, he's nice. I like his family. You know, we live close by. his family. You know, we live close by. his family. You know, we live close by. Um, you know, he's got a good job. This Um, you know, he's got a good job. This Um, you know, he's got a good job. This and that. And then on the flip side, and that. And then on the flip side, and that. And then on the flip side, intuitively, you're like, I don't intuitively, you're like, I don't intuitively, you're like, I don't [  ] like this dude. [  ] like this dude. [  ] like this dude. But because the pros list logically But because the pros list logically But because the pros list logically makes more sense, I'll give them a makes more sense, I'll give them a makes more sense, I'll give them a chance. And and some people based off chance. And and some people based off chance. And and some people based off of, you know, their personality, some of, you know, their personality, some of, you know, their personality, some people will go and and spend time and people will go and and spend time and people will go and and spend time and say, "All right, no, I was I I I should say, "All right, no, I was I I I should say, "All right, no, I was I I I should have never done this." And and move on. have never done this." And and move on. have never done this." And and move on. Some people will marry the guy and they Some people will marry the guy and they Some people will marry the guy and they will have a life of pain because they will have a life of pain because they will have a life of pain because they keep going back saying, "Well, keep going back saying, "Well, keep going back saying, "Well, technically I should be happy because we technically I should be happy because we technically I should be happy because we have the nice house and the nice car and have the nice house and the nice car and have the nice house and the nice car and he's got a good job and he's he's got a good job and he's he's got a good job and he's nice." And so the goal is is that you nice." And so the goal is is that you nice." And so the goal is is that you have the ability, you have the tools, have the ability, you have the tools, have the ability, you have the tools, you have the knowledge of who you are at you have the knowledge of who you are at you have the knowledge of who you are at your core. You know who your character your core. You know who your character your core. You know who your character is, you know what your values are. you is, you know what your values are. you is, you know what your values are. you know more about yourself so that you can know more about yourself so that you can know more about yourself so that you can make decisions that are out of make decisions that are out of make decisions that are out of inspiration. And inspiration is not just inspiration. And inspiration is not just inspiration. And inspiration is not just about a pros list or a pros and cons about a pros list or a pros and cons about a pros list or a pros and cons list. Like this is about your energy. list. Like this is about your energy. list. Like this is about your energy. This is about how you feel intuitively. This is about how you feel intuitively. This is about how you feel intuitively. Like it's syncing all of the pieces Like it's syncing all of the pieces Like it's syncing all of the pieces together for you to make decisions that together for you to make decisions that together for you to make decisions that are are just truly aligned with what's are are just truly aligned with what's are are just truly aligned with what's going to best serve you and the outcomes going to best serve you and the outcomes going to best serve you and the outcomes you're looking for. I think uh an easy you're looking for. I think uh an easy you're looking for. I think uh an easy way to maybe see it, you know, slightly way to maybe see it, you know, slightly way to maybe see it, you know, slightly polarized, but you know, polarized, but you know, polarized, but you know, inspiration isn't always going to make inspiration isn't always going to make inspiration isn't always going to make sense. You know, you just wrote the pros sense. You know, you just wrote the pros sense. You know, you just wrote the pros and cons. You just wrote the pros and and cons. You just wrote the pros and and cons. You just wrote the pros and cons and like, well, this makes sense. I cons and like, well, this makes sense. I cons and like, well, this makes sense. I should do this, but that's not who you should do this, but that's not who you should do this, but that's not who you are. We're all unique. You know, if you are. We're all unique. You know, if you are. We're all unique. You know, if you look at somebody that everybody knows look at somebody that everybody knows look at somebody that everybody knows that's basing pretty much every decision that's basing pretty much every decision that's basing pretty much every decision of his life on through inspiration is of his life on through inspiration is of his life on through inspiration is Elon Musk. you know, I'm going to make a Elon Musk. you know, I'm going to make a Elon Musk. you know, I'm going to make a card company. Well, go take it back to card company. Well, go take it back to card company. Well, go take it back to PayPal. Like, I'm going to create uh a PayPal. Like, I'm going to create uh a PayPal. Like, I'm going to create uh a payment structure that's not associated payment structure that's not associated payment structure that's not associated with a bank. That's that doesn't make with a bank. That's that doesn't make with a bank. That's that doesn't make sense. Like, banks do that. I'm going to sense. Like, banks do that. I'm going to sense. Like, banks do that. I'm going to make a car company that doesn't use make a car company that doesn't use make a car company that doesn't use petroleum. That doesn't make sense. petroleum. That doesn't make sense. petroleum. That doesn't make sense. Every other car company is using Every other car company is using Every other car company is using petroleum. I'm I'm going to create petroleum. I'm I'm going to create petroleum. I'm I'm going to create SpaceX. Like, we have NASA for that. Why SpaceX. Like, we have NASA for that. Why SpaceX. Like, we have NASA for that. Why Why the [  ] are you creating a space Why the [  ] are you creating a space Why the [  ] are you creating a space company? But you know it wasn't about a company? But you know it wasn't about a company? But you know it wasn't about a space company. It was about space company. It was about space company. It was about telecommunications and connecting the telecommunications and connecting the telecommunications and connecting the world and all these things. No, nothing world and all these things. No, nothing world and all these things. No, nothing made any sense on paper. But he was made any sense on paper. But he was made any sense on paper. But he was inspiring. He was being authentic to inspiring. He was being authentic to inspiring. He was being authentic to himself. And when you do that, guess himself. And when you do that, guess himself. And when you do that, guess what? The unit provide provides for you. what? The unit provide provides for you. what? The unit provide provides for you. The the door is open. But but he was The the door is open. But but he was The the door is open. But but he was also solving problems that were bigger also solving problems that were bigger also solving problems that were bigger than most people could see. And and so, than most people could see. And and so, than most people could see. And and so, you know, that that's kind of a a you know, that that's kind of a a you know, that that's kind of a a different topic for a different podcast, different topic for a different podcast, different topic for a different podcast, but you know, I I think that what you but you know, I I think that what you but you know, I I think that what you said is so so significant. Uh yeah, it said is so so significant. Uh yeah, it said is so so significant. Uh yeah, it doesn't always it doesn't always make doesn't always it doesn't always make doesn't always it doesn't always make sense and and sometimes it's hard for sense and and sometimes it's hard for sense and and sometimes it's hard for people to trust that. people to trust that. people to trust that. So trust yourself even if it doesn't So trust yourself even if it doesn't So trust yourself even if it doesn't make sense. If it resonates, feels like make sense. If it resonates, feels like make sense. If it resonates, feels like love, you're inspired with it. If you love, you're inspired with it. If you love, you're inspired with it. If you feel that in your heart, not your gut. feel that in your heart, not your gut. feel that in your heart, not your gut. Your heart's where you're feeling Your heart's where you're feeling Your heart's where you're feeling inspiration. Your instincts, your inspiration. Your instincts, your inspiration. Your instincts, your impulses is in your gut. So connect with impulses is in your gut. So connect with impulses is in your gut. So connect with yourself. Gain that awareness. And then yourself. Gain that awareness. And then yourself. Gain that awareness. And then if it doesn't make sense, still trust if it doesn't make sense, still trust if it doesn't make sense, still trust it. And for my for my logical people, it. And for my for my logical people, it. And for my for my logical people, they're like, "What does that mean?" they're like, "What does that mean?" they're like, "What does that mean?" Values. Values course. We have a online Values. Values course. We have a online Values. Values course. We have a online values course. you can go and actually values course. you can go and actually values course. you can go and actually do the work, determine your values, and do the work, determine your values, and do the work, determine your values, and that is the compass. That is the compass that is the compass. That is the compass that is the compass. That is the compass to lead a life that you're able to make to lead a life that you're able to make to lead a life that you're able to make decisions out of inspiration and not decisions out of inspiration and not decisions out of inspiration and not desperation. So, there is a a logical desperation. So, there is a a logical desperation. So, there is a a logical logistical component to this is, you logistical component to this is, you logistical component to this is, you know, if you feel very disconnected with know, if you feel very disconnected with know, if you feel very disconnected with yourself and you're like, I don't even yourself and you're like, I don't even yourself and you're like, I don't even know what inspires me. I don't know how know what inspires me. I don't know how know what inspires me. I don't know how to make decisions that are aligned. to make decisions that are aligned. to make decisions that are aligned. That's okay. You know, we've all been That's okay. You know, we've all been That's okay. You know, we've all been there at certain points. And for there at certain points. And for there at certain points. And for me, because I'm very analytically and me, because I'm very analytically and me, because I'm very analytically and logically minded, it was the values logically minded, it was the values logically minded, it was the values helped me understand more about myself helped me understand more about myself helped me understand more about myself so that I could start making decisions so that I could start making decisions so that I could start making decisions out of inspiration and stop making out of inspiration and stop making out of inspiration and stop making decisions out of desperation, which decisions out of desperation, which decisions out of desperation, which essentially always blew up my essentially always blew up my essentially always blew up my [Laughter] [Laughter] [Laughter] face. All right, guys. We will make sure face. All right, guys. We will make sure face. All right, guys. We will make sure to put the link below so that you can to put the link below so that you can to put the link below so that you can access the values course and uh get access the values course and uh get access the values course and uh get started on starting to understand more started on starting to understand more started on starting to understand more about who you are and make more about who you are and make more about who you are and make more decisions out of inspiration.