Why Your Goals Die by Week 2
Episode 297
Most people don’t “fail” at goals because they’re lazy or undisciplined—they fail because the goal is built on the wrong foundation. In this episode, we break down why goals fall apart (sometimes in a week), how to tell if your “vision” is actually your ego talking, and how to set a vision that’s rooted in your real values so your actions become natural—not forced. Health, success, money, the body… it’s all integrated. When you stop isolating your life into separate buckets and start building from alignment, you stop burning out and start compounding. #IntegrativeYou #TheDoctorDuo #GoalSetting #NewYearGoals #ValuesBasedLiving #IdentityShift #MindsetWork #HighPerformanceHabits #BurnoutRecovery #EntrepreneurMindset #EntrepreneurLife #WomenInBusiness #LeadershipDevelopment #PersonalGrowthJourney #HolisticHealth #IntegrativeMedicine #LongevityLifestyle #NervousSystemRegulation #Biohacking #HealthOptimization #ConciergeMedicine #FamilyWellness #LegacyBuilding #WealthAndWellness #PurposeDrivenLife #VisionCasting #SelfMastery #DemartiniMethod #HigherSelf #BeDoHave 3 Key Takeaways: Your goals only stick when they’re rooted in true values (not fear, ego, or “what you think you should want”). If the goal is built on proving something, it’ll collapse—or you’ll hate the process. Health isn’t the end goal for most people—it’s the tool. When health supports what you actually value (family, impact, leadership, freedom), you stop needing motivation and start moving with consistency. You need a vision beyond the vision + honesty about where you are (A) to map a real path to where you’re going (B). If you’re not honest about A—or your B is borrowed—you’ll burn out. Quotes: “What is your goal rooted in? Because ‘I want to be healthier’ and ‘I want to be thinner’ are two very different things.” “Health is just a tool—it’s the tool that helps you get what you actually value.” Find Integrative You Radio On: Website Youtube Apple Spotify 2 Doctors Committed to Innovating the Healthcare Ex
Topics: goals, unknown, goal, health, integrative, because, values, year
Key takeaways from this episode
- ## Show Notes: Why Your Goals Die by Week 2
- Goals only stick when they are deeply rooted in your genuine values, not in fear, ego, or societal expectations.
- Goals built on proving something to others or yourself are unsustainable and often lead to misery rather than achievement.
- Health is not the ultimate end goal; it's a powerful tool that enables you to pursue what you truly value, like family, impact, or freedom.
- True vision requires an honest assessment of your current reality (A) and a clearly defined destination (B) that is authentically yours.
Pull quotes
This is the place where you become limitless. **Unknown:** We are covering the latest and greatest topics, of course, in a disruptive fashion, around integrative medicine, mental health, and human behavior.
We will be sprinkling in some truth bombs for our healthpreneurs so they can join us in our mission to evolve healthcare.
If you are health curious and growth focused, you are in the right place. **Unknown:** But buckle up, because this is real, this is raw, and this is disruptive.
Transcript
**Unknown:** Welcome to Integrative U Radio, hosted by Dr. Nick Carruthers and yours truly, Dr. Nicole Rivera. This is the place where you become limitless.
**Unknown:** We are covering the latest and greatest topics, of course, in a disruptive fashion, around integrative medicine, mental health, and human behavior. We are also covering how those topics affect the human and family dynamics. We will be sprinkling in some truth bombs for our healthpreneurs so they can join us in our mission to evolve healthcare. If you are health curious and growth focused, you are in the right place.
**Unknown:** But buckle up, because this is real, this is raw, and this is disruptive. This is Integrative U Radio. Hello, everyone. Welcome back to another episode of Integrative U Radio.
**Unknown:** So we're here to shit on your goals for the new year. Not your life, just your goals. Just your 2026 goals. So I do- Which is an interesting theme, because we just recorded about assholes, and now we're shitting.
**Unknown:** It's... We put it together. Now we're the assholes. You put it together.
**Unknown:** Yeah. Yeah, you know, here we are. Well, I will say, you know, at least in my social media algorithm, uh, it, it's been a little bit more of a refreshing, uh, like, avenue people are taking to, to the new year. Instead of it, you know, being positive affirmations and New Year's resolutions, it's, it's been a little bit more about, you know, learn from...
**Unknown:** Or how are you gonna make it different? Uh, you can still hear me, right? I can hear you now. You cut out for a second.
**Unknown:** Okay. So recapping, just saying that there are people that are talking more about what didn't work for you in, in the previous year or previous years, and how are you changing that? How are you putting up boundaries, or how are you shifting that, that energy? And, and I appreciate that because essentially why we're here to shit on your goals is because many of us at certain points have set goals that either lost traction in as little as a week to maybe a few weeks, or goals that have just never come to fruition, regardless if it's a New Year resolution, New Year goal or not.
**Unknown:** And we're here to talk about w-why the fuck does that happen? You know, why do we set goals and burn out? Why do we set goals and never achieve them? What's, what's the root cause?
**Unknown:** So I'm gonna give mine. Okay. Are you ready to give yours? Go, go, go.
**Unknown:** Fine. My main point that I wanna bring to the table is what is your goal, vision, resolution? What is it rooted in? And what I mean by that is especially in our industry, we've heard, "I wanna be healthier." But when we started to ask better questions, that person really just wanted to be thinner.
**Unknown:** They didn't want to have the physical aesthetic that they did. They didn't really wanna become healthier. They really just wanted to become thinner and look different in the mirror. So that's two very different things.
**Unknown:** If you wanna become healthier, and you also have a vision of what your life looks like as that healthiest version of yourself, and there's something that is deeply aligned to your values. I wanna be healthy because I wanna grow and build a multi-million dollar company that impacts the world and changes how this is done or solves this problem. I wanna be healthier because family is one of my highest values, and I want... I have a grandkid coming into my life, and I wanna be able to pick them up, throw them in the air, go to the park with them, run marathons with them, whatever.
**Unknown:** You have not only a goal, but you have a vision. Then you have a vision beyond the vision that's all aligned to what's most important to you. Yeah. I just wrote down, and this is something that I do going through values with clients, is, you know, people think, oh, like, health is a value.
**Unknown:** And I'm like- Of all the people that work- I mean- ... we work with, I don't think any of them actually have health as a value. I'm like, "Mm, probably not. Could be, but probably not." Because so far, everybody that I've worked with, it hasn't been.
**Unknown:** Somebody out there it is, but not for the people I've worked with. And if that's your value, you probably don't need me. You need me because it's not your value. But, you know, it, it's, it's the same thing but different than what you're saying.
**Unknown:** It's like, you know, the vision beyond the vision. Y- Health is just a tool. It's the tool to give you, help you get what you valueIf you focus on the tool and trying to achieve the tool, guess what? You'll never get what you really want because that wasn't the focus.
**Unknown:** If you focus on what you really, really want, and if that's authentic and truly aligned, then health is going to be a byproduct because you're naturally going to show up as a better version of yourself because this is so important. Health by itself, guess what? Not that important to a lot of people. But they'll choose, you know, actions of waking up, exercising, eating quality foods, not overly drinking, not overly eating, moderation, et cetera, because if they don't, that's going to interfere, brain fog, fatigue, et cetera, with what they truly want in their life, whether that's building a business, whether that's showing up and being present for their children, whether that's being, you know, an awesome husband, wife, et cetera.
**Unknown:** You know? Whatever's truly aligned, that's what's going to be powerful. Yeah. And if you focus on the health, that's when people need all the motivation.
**Unknown:** They need external motivation say, like, "Yeah, this is gonna get you excited, and you're gonna wake up early for two weeks, three weeks," and then you're not- Mm-hmm ... because it really wasn't that important to you. 100%. It's, it's actually funny because something that I was, I was writing down as you were talking, and I think this is just an import- important point to make, is that a lot of people...
**Unknown:** So going back to what we were talking about with, with the people that we work with and how they say, "Oh yeah, definitely one of my highest values is health. That's why I'm here." And I've actually taken in a lot of data by asking better questions with all the clients that we've worked with over the past, I- I'm gonna say, let's say five years, primarily because I just didn't ask these questions in the earlier part of our career 'cause I just didn't know what I didn't know. But it actually turned out that most of the people that we worked with, they had a massive amount of fear amou- around their health because they saw someone get sick, lose their life, die from cancer, chronic illness, et cetera. And so there is an aspect of fear that is rooted in what we call your void.
**Unknown:** So, you know, if you have a, uh, a void of something, you don't have something, then that could play a role enrou- around some of your fears or anxieties, and that that can be a driver to your values. But the thing is, is that that can only get you so far. You've, you may have heard us talk about this topic in the past is that, you know, one of my, um, values is, is innovative leadership. And part of that leadership, what I, what I classified as leadership in the past and what I classify it as now is very, very different because that was born out of a major void, trauma, fear, lack of security, lack of safety.
**Unknown:** So I had to... I, I felt like I had to lead my own life in a certain way to get out of that scarcity, to get out of that pain, essentially. And then I realized that it is truly a, a driver in my life. It is a true value, but the version of it now is very, very different.
**Unknown:** So I want people to kind of keep this in the back of your mind because when we give you your best tools of how to go about creating only a few, maybe three at max, goals for yourself... And don't get me wrong, those might have different sub-goals underneath them, but three major, like, big goals, move- uh, needle movers. Some of them might be rooted in more of inspiration. This is who I'm becoming.
**Unknown:** This is what I am excited about. This is my, the vision of the greatest version of me, the vision of the greatest version of my life. But you have to challenge it, and you have to challenge it of, is this truly me and what I really want, or is this rooted in an old fear, scarcity pattern? 'Cause you called me out.
**Unknown:** You can tell them the story about when I was reading you my vision for 2026 and beyond 'cause we're... I wasn't... 2026 is just one stepping stone in my big vision. And so I was reading a portion of it, and you're...
**Unknown:** And I was like, "I would love your feedback." And you're like, "Well, yeah, it sounds-" Which scares me because, you know, when a wife asks you your feedback or even a business partner asks- I wouldn't have asked if I didn't wanna know ... Ask feedback, Jessica. And well, I responded. It was about 93% accurate.
**Unknown:** Mm-hmm. And I did that also to, you know, make her curious, um, instead of just diving right in, kind of test the water, you know? Uh, uh- Test, read the body language. I, I am closer than an arm length away.
**Unknown:** I can get smacked. Um, so you know, she goes, "Oh, well, carry on. Now I'm really interested." Yeah. I was.
**Unknown:** And this is the human behavior for people, you know, is you, you can ask questions or you can give ambiguous, um, answers to kinda draw somebody in more, um, so that you don't get slapped.So she was really interested, and I go, "Well, you know, from everything you read, a lot of it sound really authentic to who you are and who you are becoming, but a little bit of it seemed rooted into the old version of Nicole that was, I think, more connected now to, like, what you would call, like, your ego. 'I wanna be seen. I want people to think I'm a badass,' instead of you just, you know, knowing you're a badass. You don't need anybody else to think you're a badass." Uh, and just gave some more examples, and she's like, "You're 100% correct," which is, like, the third time in, you know, my life she's ever said that to me.
**Unknown:** Yeah. Well, I- a- and again, I, I only share this because I do think that this is a bit of a theme, especially in high performers, high achievers, which tend to be a lot of entrepreneurs, who is a huge portion of our audience and a lot of who we work with in our private practice. But, you know, a lot of us are, are these high performers, these high achievers, and we're usually doing it because we were filling a void of not being heard, not being f- uh, seen, not being valued, not being appreciated, um, feeling alone. And, you know, we, we sometimes create these personal brands, and we don't do this consciously very often, but, you know, we're, we wanna become a speaker, we wanna become an expert, we wanna become the best in our field or the best...
**Unknown:** the biggest expert in X. And, you know, I want my... the biggest podcast, and I want this and I want that, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba. And it's because we are trying to prove something to the world, we're trying to prove something to ourself.
**Unknown:** We're essentially trying to prove something, prove something to that little child who felt not seen, not valued, and not appreciated. Um, you know, I know that's a big part of my story when I finally was able to see it and, and be honest with myself about it. And, you know, it really... it gave me a lot of freedom when I was able to say, "I don't need that anymore.
**Unknown:** I don't want that anymore. I want to be able to feel enough, um, by just being me and not being a hyper-achiever." And, and so part of my vision was, uh, all about, you know, speaking on stages, which is the only part of... 'cause I had a 2023 vision, and I read through it, uh, just, you know, December of 2025, and I was like, "Wow, it's really awesome that majority of this, 90% of it has come to fruition," and the only part that didn't, that I hence carried over into my 2026, it didn't come to fruition 'cause it wasn't fucking aligned. And that- Right ...
**Unknown:** was me, I wanna speak on a stage with 1,000 people, blah, blah, blah. And I'm not saying that that might not happen, but the roo- what it was rooted in, it was rooted in I'm not enough, I need to be seen, I need to be appreciated, I need to be looked at as the expert, I need to be needed. It, it was rooted in that. Which come- wants me to come to a quick clarity for people.
**Unknown:** It's understand that your life is giving you and showing you who you are. You know? Yes. That's the be to have principle.
**Unknown:** So she, quote-unquote, "achieved" everything except that because that wasn't who she was. So now she has two options. She has, you know, that's... she took the time to- Hold onto the fantasy.
**Unknown:** Well, she took the time for feedback, you know? She was like, "Okay. Well, I, I was all that. All that came into my life.
**Unknown:** I was the being. I did things that was congruent, and I had those things. What I didn't have was the speaking on stage for a large group of people, blah, blah, blah," because you really weren't the person that is that, you know? Going back to the two options, you had an option to reflect and say, "That happened because I wasn't in alignment.
**Unknown:** That's not really who I am. It was my ego that was wanting this, not really me," or, "Okay. What do I need to do to actually become this woman?" Because if you were that and it was authentic, you might have had limiting beliefs or something that was holding you back from it still. Yes.
**Unknown:** So then you could've bro- That is... I think that's a great, very- You could have broken down- ... great clarifying point ... you could've...
**Unknown:** realizing that, you could have broken down those limiting beliefs and roadblocks that were holding you back from actually being that woman, but you realized that it was actually not in alignment with really who you were. And what was interesting is that you also, in the 2026 vision, you had the same thing but the complete opposite, that I'm gonna speak to a small group of powerful females as a leader to them. That was in alignment. So you're still speaking, you're still leading, you're actually authentically connected with a group that was aligned with you versus I wanna be on this stage, you know, wearing a fucking baller female suit or whatever the hell you're gonna wear.
**Unknown:** And thinking I'm the shit and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, feeding ego. So you quickly squashed that, moved on. And this is awesome because talking about your social media algorithm, how it was like, you know-More of a, a recap, an evaluation of what didn't work over the past year, which is awesome. Everybody should do that.
**Unknown:** We're gonna give you a little bit- But- ... more detail about this towards the end. But I also challenge, you know, don't wait for the end of the year. Like- Yeah ...
**Unknown:** this is- Of course ... this is something I, I do with my four-year-old. I lay in bed with him at night. I'm like, "What was the best thing- We do this on a weekly basis.
**Unknown:** Well, yeah. Literally every single week we ask ourselves these questions, and then we hold each other accountable to, to it as well. Um, it- But this is something I do with Quentin. I'm like, "What was the- Yeah ...
**Unknown:** best part of your day, and what was the worst part of your day?" Yeah. And then, you know, "What'd you, what'd you do to create that?" Yeah. "What'd you do to create the best part of your day?" You know, not telling him that he needs to do more of it. Yeah.
**Unknown:** I'm just helping him become conscious of, this was great. You enjoyed it. This is what you did to do it. Now connect the dots.
**Unknown:** Mm. You're intelligent. If you wanna do... Like, have more, do more, be more.
**Unknown:** Yeah. What did you do that sucked, you know? What was the worst part of your day? What'd you do to create that?
**Unknown:** Yeah. Okay. Well, now you're conscious of what you did to create it, in the future, if it happens again, you'll be like, "Oh, crap," 'cause we're gonna go through the same process again, and eventually he'll be able to ca- connect the dots. So he's learning from experience, which is the best teacher.
**Unknown:** I'm not telling him... Sometimes I do, but I try not to tell him, you know, "Do more of this, do less of this." Like- Do you know you just quoted Julius Caesar? No. "Experience is the best teacher." Mm.
**Unknown:** That was previous life. That was you in a previous life. Got it. Well- So it's just- ...
**Unknown:** I, I wanna go back really quick though, because I think that this is, like, we need... People need to understand this point, is because I think there is a lot of people doing this limiting belief work, and, and I'm s- it, it is valuable. But as you just said, is there was the option to say, this is not aligned, which you need, you need data about yourself to know, to be able to test that. You need to know your own values in order to test that.
**Unknown:** Because otherwise, if you don't know your own values and you don't have the ability to, to test that, w- you know, Nick gave it to me, but even if you're doing it for yourself, you're rereading and you're like, "This doesn't feel right," or the, "I've had this on my goal list two years in a row, three years in a row. Why has it never happened?" You could play that role. Uh, can you see the sh- reflection? That's why you're laughing.
**Unknown:** Um, you can play that game of, you know, "Oh, it's because I didn't do this or I didn't do that, or I still have limiting beliefs to break down." But if you know your values, you can ask yourself the simple question, "Is this truly fucking aligned with my true, true, true values of who I am and who I'm becoming?" And that was the key factor that helped me to understand that I do wanna teach and I do wanna speak, it is one of my absolute favorite things to do, but I actually want to do it with a very, very specific type of person, group of people, that are interested in taking the information, the knowledge, to literally become the greatest version of themselves, so that they can create the greatest version of their families. I'm not interested in necessarily just helping people that just wanna make a fuck ton of money in their business, or they only wanna get better because they wanna be skinny or they wanna be healthy because they wanna look a certain way to, to find their new husband or wife. Like, or they just wanna get rid of symptoms because those symptoms don't allow them to vacation. Like, I'm interested in speaking, educating, and, and collaborating with people that are interested in, in creating a family dynamic that it leaves a legacy.
**Unknown:** Like, their family can leave an impact and a legacy just because they're fucking awesome humans, and they, they treated everyone they've come in contact with with such a, an amazing capacity that they're remembered, or it's because they created something or, or some framework that solves a major problem for the world. I don't really care, but if you're interested in becoming the greatest version of yourself and helping your family be the greatest version of itself, then, like, fuck yeah, let's chat. Let's do it. Let's l- I'll speak, et cetera.
**Unknown:** But speaking to a group of 1,000 people that 90% of them could give two fucks about what I have to say, that was feeding my ego, yes. So to interject, fair beginning, Nicole said her social media wasn't New Year's resolutions or affirmations. Not that those aren't important, it's just not what you do, but how you do it. Everything she just said there, she was most lit up by, "I wanna work with fucking awesome humans." A great affirmation, look in the mirror, "I work with fucking awesome humans." And to watch yourself and see how your body changes when you say that to yourself.
**Unknown:** That would be a very powerful affirmation for her. It would be in alignment. Everything she just said, she was fired up. She was aligned.
**Unknown:** You could tell it was authentic. You could tell it was true. It was her. So this is when you should use an affirmation.
**Unknown:** Yep. An a- an affirmation if she goes- If it's aligned, yeah I am-- and this, you can tell these, the affirmations, like, "I am a, a powerful woman that delivers speeches to thousands, to tens of thousands of people who look up to me as a leader," blah, blah, blah. Like, if that's your affirmation- Yeah. No ...
**Unknown:** it's bullshit, and your subconscious is- You sound like a robot. ... your subconscious is already like, "Girl, bro, this ain't you. I'm gonna give you experiences that are gonna cause you a lot of pain as a feedback mechanism for you to see and feel this shit is not aligned." Mm-hmm.
**Unknown:** So food for thought, if you're reading affirmations right now or somebody taught you an affirmation like that, say, "Thanks, but no thanks." Affirmations need to be real and raw. Like, you need to feel, it needs to be your vocabulary. And for Nicole, you know, it's not proper. She's from Newark, New Jersey.
**Unknown:** "I work with fucking awesome humans," which got me excited because humans are the actual real version of yourself. People comes from persona, which is a facade. So if you're working with people, already the verbiage of that isn't aligned because people is not actually authentic. People is the persona, a facade created by society.
**Unknown:** But we're not gonna get down that rabbit hole today. Yes. Well, backtracking a little bit. So, you know, we, we talked about, uh, quite a few different things, but just remembering that as you are creating goals for yourself, you're creating a, a vision for yourself, and, and I think it's more important for us to keep this idea of a vision versus a goal because you essentially create your vision and then you set goals to help you achieve that vision.
**Unknown:** It's pretty much from going from A to B. So you are at A, B is the vision, and then you create the goals, the, the stepping stones in order to get to the B. And also, you have to be conscious of how far is the distance? How big is the gap?
**Unknown:** This is something that Keith Cunningham has taught in reference to business. He's like, "You know, there's a lot of people that will not wanna be honest with where they are. They don't get clarity on their A." And so they talk about, you know, "I wanna be here. I wanna make a million dollars, $10 million in my business," but they're not being honest with where they are, so they're essentially just-- they don't have a clear map from A to B because they're either not being honest with where they are or they have a complete bullshit, uh, injected goal.
**Unknown:** "I wanna make 10 million because the other company that's similar to mine in my industry makes 10 million." And so it's fueled by ego. It's not fueled by alignment. It's not even fueled by a why. So we need to be very, very conscious of what is your vision beyond the vision?
**Unknown:** Like, what's the big, big vision that if you told the average person, they would think you're fucking crazy because, because most people are like, "You can't have a great life." Yeah, well, you can't have a great life. Fucking deal with that. So you have the vision beyond the vision, then you have, you know, the vision of what the next year, year of your life looks like, and then you start to set goals to achieve that. If you don't have that clear vision that's truly aligned to who you are and it's not a bullshit vision that somebody told you you should have, you're, you're not going to be successful.
**Unknown:** So you also have to be conscious of like, let's be honest with what is this rooted in. If you wanna be thinner a-and you don't care about health, then just say, "I wanna be thinner." Like, make that part, uh, of the vision of, "I wanna look this way, and when I look this way, this is what I'm doing. I'm doing this. I'm going here.
**Unknown:** I'm talking to this person. I walk this way. I talk this way." I-- like, whatever it is, there's nothing wrong with that. You don't have to be, you know, "I wanna be the healthiest version of myself." You-- that doesn't have to be a goal just because people tell you you need to be healthy.
**Unknown:** You know, health might be part of the journey for you to get to that best-looking version of yourself or the most wealthy version of yourself, and you might say, "I wanna make a fuck ton of money," but you know that you can't think straight, and so you become the healthiest version of yourself to get your mind more clear so you can stay focused and be committed to making X amount of dollars. All of it, at the end of the day, interweaves with each other. This is why we've been Integrative Wellness Group and now we're Integrative You is because everything is integrated and everybody is trying to isolate out, "I got my business goals, and I got my family goals, and I got my relationship goals, and I got my personal goals." But if you don't take the time to interweave all of that together as you make a plan for your year, your three years, your five years, this is why you burn out. This is why it all kind of disassembles.
**Unknown:** So, you know, our passion is truly helping entrepreneurial parents and families, like, how do you bring it all together? You know, how do you, how do you stay focused on all these different buckets and have them work together opposed to against each other? How many people are like, "I wanna do this in my business," but then, you know, slowly their relationship is crumbling apart? They, they-- if, if you support your relationship while simultaneously supporting your business, you'll go farther.If you say, "Oh, I'm gonna give 100% to my business, but only for quarter one, then quarter two I'll work on my, my relatio- " No.
**Unknown:** Nope. That's not how it works. It's the same way we look at the physical body. People are like, "Okay, so what are we doing?
**Unknown:** Are we gonna do the, the liver protocol and then we'll work on my thyroid?" I'm like, "No, we're working on everything together." And they're like, "What do you mean? My last doctor told me I had to do, like, heavy metal detox, and then I had to do chemical detox, and then I had to do my thyroid, and then I..." And I was like, "No, that's why it didn't work. That's why you're here." They're like, "Oh." I was like, "Just, just trust the process." So I think that Nick is going to have- Yep. Uh, Nick's gonna have his own version of this, so I'm gonna let you share as well.
**Unknown:** Because our brains work very different, and I do think that, you know, the average female brain, average, you know, masculine brain, it, they, they work different in how they create a vision and set goals. Hence, I said that I created a story. I was like, I was do- I have, we have all these assessments that we did, we did do. But I felt like I needed to just brain dump before doing those assessments, and I essentially wrote out the categories of life.
**Unknown:** I wrote out personal, me. I wrote out family. I wrote out relationship, even though Nick is part of my family, I still wanted to isolate out and speak to exactly what I wanted our relationship to look like, in addition to what relationships look like with my friends group. Finances, wealth, and then business.
**Unknown:** Those are the main categories that I focused on. Um, and I wrote the story. I wrote the story of, in my current brain and vision, the best version of who I'm becoming, uh, from who I am and what I know and how I talk and how I hold myself and how I walk and how I dress, and what my physical body looks like, what my face looks like, everything. And how I'm perceived by others.
**Unknown:** And I wrote exactly what I want my family to look like, parenting to look like, my kids to look like, my home life to look like, our relationship to look like, what my friends are like, what do we do together, what do we talk about. And, and I separated out business and wealth because some of you business owners, and I know I've experienced this quite a bit with coaching healthpreneurs, is that you put both in the same bucket, but really at the end of the day, what you're building in a wealth portfolio is different than what you're doing in your business. Your business shouldn't really be your only asset, but looking at all of the assets that you are creating, acquiring, working for, et cetera. So I just wrote the story, and the story was...
**Unknown:** Some people might be like, "You're crazy." Like, "Are you really... Like, do you really think it's possible for someone to achieve all this?" That's the point. The point is the vision is so big and grandiose, and it's, it's really exact- Like, it's, it's the best version of yourself, the best version of your life. And the question that I...
**Unknown:** When people are like, "I don't even know where to start," I'm like, "If you did not have to earn money tomorrow, you're independently wealthy, what would your life look like? What would you do because you want to do it, you get to do it? If you could hand pluck or you could curate your perfect partner, what would it look like? If your kids, you know, would be...
**Unknown:** You would see them at 20 years old and you're like, 'Oh, my God. They're fucking awesome. I did such a good job,' like, what would they be like? What would they look like?" Like, you, you have the ability to, to create anything you want if you have the utmost clarity and the utmost focus, and I don't think a lot of people realize how powerful we are in that capacity.
**Unknown:** But this is one of the reasons why people teach things like meditation... Or, I'm sorry, manifestation and meditation, because they've experienced that massive clarity of vision and having a vision beyond the vision is what is the key to creating the greatest version of your life and the greatest version of yourself. Nick didn't write a story. I'm not a story person.
**Unknown:** Sounds great, not how my brain works. I'm very, um... I don't know the word you'd say, but in my, in my brain, I would say efficient. You are very innovative and efficient.
**Unknown:** Stories take up a lot more space and time than I think is necessary. So I did something similar, just I guess more of like that man to the point, less, less fluff. So I had the categories, uh, of life, and literally just wrote everything that was, you know, the vision, uh, that I wanted in there with as few words as possible, and... 'cause I wanted to make sure it was clear and concrete for me.
**Unknown:** And the- For me it was, that's left brain, so I'm always processing things through both brains, left brain, right brain.To make sure that it fits, um, that it's authentic on both, both sides. You know, we can, we can process something, left brain's like, "Yep. Fuck yeah. That's me." And then the right brain is the feeling aspect of it, which processes it completely different, and the right brain, if I'm feeling that, like, overly proud, I know that this is not congruent.
**Unknown:** This is just filling a void. If I... So long story short, I want everything on that big vision to be inspiration, to be felt within my heart, and if it's not felt within my heart, if it's felt somewhere else in the body, I know that it's not congruent. So it's a quick way for me to check in, being like, "Okay, here's what I think my vision is.
**Unknown:** Can I hold myself accountable? Where do I feel it? How do I feel it? How strong is it?" And, and then I go, like, deeper.
**Unknown:** Just 'cause it's in your heart region doesn't mean it's necessarily, like, it's you. Um, so once you feel inspired, you wanna get used to the quality of that. You know, what is the temperature? What is the color?
**Unknown:** Is it warm? Is it light? Is it heavy? Is it dark?
**Unknown:** Like, go through objectively like a scientist and break down as specific as you can what your intuition, what inspiration feels like for you. And the more you can get used to feeling that, then you have a very good, quote-unquote, "temperature gauge" to be able to judge things against. So I go through left brain, I create the categories, fill it out. I go into the right brain, I check in- For those of you that are like, "Uh," we're gonna give you the guide to this.
**Unknown:** Um, so you are aware that, you know, you can kind of just now focus on what he's saying, uh, to take away pearls, but you will actually have access to a guide, um, with all of the specific questions so that you can... You can either do my style of the storytelling or you could do Dr. Nick's style, which is more specific questions about specific categories. And, you know, once, once you know it's congruent, it's um, let's play ball.
**Unknown:** Well, and I also think that, you know, at, at the end of the day, one of the other links that we'll have here is if you are like, "The story one really vibes with me," and I think that would be great, but you start the process and you get really stuck, you really need to do your values. Like, it, it's, it's at the foundation of all of our planning that we do for ourselves, for our family, for our business, is all rooted in alignment to the values. And any time that we have, start creating a laundry list of different goals or business initiatives or big decisions that need to be made, we cross-reference it back to check how aligned it is with our values. Like, the vacations we take are dictated by our values.
**Unknown:** Like, it's... I, I think people just don't understand, like, how you can, you can literally create a frame- your own personal framework that you apply to your life that allows you to maximize your time, your money, your energy, and it allows you to make big and bold decisions with confidence. Like, that is one of the, the biggest, uh, avenues of freedom that anybody could ask for. So I, I do want you guys to keep in mind that knowing who you are at your core and knowing what you value the most and what is absolutely most important to you i- is the, the guiding force behind creating goals, mapping your year, mapping your next five years.
**Unknown:** And so, uh, the main thing that I wanna say is you need to know your values, number one. Number two, if you have not tep- tapped into your creative juices in a really long time and you have way too many fucking limiting beliefs or shitty people in your fucking ear telling you that you can't, you can't, you can't, you can't, you can't, then, like, my version you're probably not gonna be able to do. I don't think I would've been able to do my version five years ago, which is sitting down and saying, "This is the badass that I wanna be. This is what I want my relationship to look like.
**Unknown:** This is the amount of money that I wanna have, and know that I will create it." Like, that took, took me a long time. But one of the things that Nick didn't share, um, that was part of both of our process, um, was also reflecting on the year prior. So no matter where you are in your journey, looking at, uh, knowing the, the, the mind and human behavior, it's looking at, like, what didn't work could be a starting place for those of you that haven't tapped into creativity, you haven't tapped into vision because you just feel chaotic and stuck and overwhelmed, and you think it's like, "Oh, cool podcast, guys. That's not for me.
**Unknown:** That can't happen for me." Like, yes, it can. Get out of your own fucking way. Love you. But start with what didn't fucking work, because if you're in that mindset, I'm sure you have a laundry list of what didn't work.
**Unknown:** And if you use that information through this guide that we've created, this framework that we've created, you can then understand why it's not working, understand the root of it, and then also choose a new level of tolerance, choose a new path, choose a new pattern, and shift that as you move into this year and beyond. Boom. I was like, "Does he have anything else he's gonna say?" All right, guys. So we are going to give you access to this framework.
**Unknown:** Use it...Don't use it once. Come back to it. If you create goals and you never fucking look at them again, it, it... Just don't even do it.
**Unknown:** Just don't even bother. Literally, we have a giant calendar that is six feet wide that has our entire year mapped out. If that's overwhelming to you, do the next month to three months. We also have a whiteboard where we have all of the major things that we're doing and not doing as a reminder.
**Unknown:** The more shit is in your face that you see it over and over again, put it on the back screen of your phone. Put it somewhere where you're gonna see it. S- Put it n- on your desk. Put it on your, on your, uh, desktop and, and just put it there so that you can see it every time you have to go to work on your computer.
**Unknown:** Whatever it is, just make sure that you revisit it over and over and over and over again, and the fucking best feeling in the world is when you go back and you reread your goals, or you reread that story, and you go, "Holy shit, I did it. Like, all of it came to fruition." That's really such a powerful moment, um, and then you just keep capitalizing on that and compounding from there. So I hope that this was, uh, you know, started out as we shit on your dreams, and now we're inspiring you. All right, we'll see you on the next one.
**Unknown:** Oh. Oh. Yep. Oh.
**Unknown:** No. All right, come on. We're good. One pearl.
**Unknown:** One pearl. We're good. We're good. We're good.
**Unknown:** We're good. Okay. Okay, we're gonna leave it at that. We thank you so much for being an avid listener of Integrative U Radio, formerly known as Integrative Wellness Radio.
**Unknown:** We appreciate all of your support. We love your comments. Please visit us on social media as well as our website to see all of the fun things happening behind the scenes, and the new amazing content and courses that is being rolled out on a monthly basis. We hope to see you there.
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About Integrative You Radio
Integrative You Radio is a root cause medicine and integrative medicine podcast hosted by Dr. Nicole Rivera and Dr. Nick Carruthers — two integrative doctors who build personalized wellness protocols from your DNA, minerals, hormones, gut, and nervous system rather than from a population template. Looking for an integrative doctor who reads your labs together instead of in isolation? This is the show.
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