When Patchwork Fucks Up Your Life
Episode 264
In this episode of Integrative You Radio, Dr. Nicole and Dr. Nick get real about the dangers of “patchwork” solutions—those quick fixes we use to mask pain or problems instead of getting to the root cause. Using Nicole’s own experience with pregnancy pain and arnica as a jumping-off point, they dive into how this mindset shows up in health, relationships, business, and even parenting. The conversation challenges the cultural obsession with “fast, cheap, and easy,” and inspires listeners to choose deep, proactive problem-solving over surface-level band-aids. #RootCauseHealing #StopThePatchwork #IntegrativeLiving #BeProactive #HolisticHealth #ValuesDrivenLife #MindBodyConnection #PersonalGrowth #IntegrativeYou #LiveLimitless 3 Key Takeaways: Patchwork Solutions Don’t Solve Root Problems: Whether it’s using natural remedies, medication, or even couples therapy, if you’re only addressing symptoms and not the underlying cause, the problem will keep resurfacing—often bigger than before. Being Proactive Beats Being Reactive: True change and growth happen when you invest time, energy, and resources into finding and fixing the root of an issue, instead of waiting for things to break down or spiral out of control. Awareness is Power: Cultivating daily awareness around where you’re being proactive vs. reactive—especially in your health, relationships, and business—empowers you to make choices that serve your highest good (and keep you out of the endless “problem circus”). Quotes: “Pain’s not the problem, it’s just the messenger. Let’s stop patching the problems—let’s fix them.” “Stop thinking that problem solving is easy. If you want to be the leader of your life, your family, or your business, problem solving is part of the job.” Find Integrative You Radio On: Website Youtube Apple Spotify 2 Doctors Committed to Innovating the Healthcare Experience. Integrative You Radio is hosted by husband-and-wife duo, Dr. Nicole Rivera and Dr. Nick Carruthers. With their voracious curiosi
Topics: integrative, unknown, problem, patchwork, nick, root, proactive, radio
Key takeaways from this episode
- ## Integrative You Radio: When Patchwork Fucks Up Your Life
- Patchwork solutions address symptoms, not the underlying issues, leading to recurring and often amplified problems.
- Proactive engagement in identifying and resolving root causes fosters genuine growth and prevents crises.
- Cultivating daily awareness of proactive versus reactive patterns empowers better life choices.
- The "patchwork" mentality in health and well-being
Pull quotes
This is the place where you become limitless. **Unknown:** We are covering the latest and greatest topics, of course, in a disruptive fashion, around integrative medicine, mental health, and human behavior.
We will be sprinkling in some truth bombs for our healthpreneurs so they can join us in our mission to evolve healthcare.
If you are health curious and growth focused, you are in the right place, but buckle up, because this is real, this is raw, and this is disruptive. **Unknown:** This is Integrative U Radio.
Transcript
**Unknown:** Welcome to Integrative U Radio, hosted by Dr. Nick Carruthers and yours truly, Dr. Nicole Rivera. This is the place where you become limitless.
**Unknown:** We are covering the latest and greatest topics, of course, in a disruptive fashion, around integrative medicine, mental health, and human behavior. We are also covering how those topics affect the human and family dynamics. We will be sprinkling in some truth bombs for our healthpreneurs so they can join us in our mission to evolve healthcare. If you are health curious and growth focused, you are in the right place, but buckle up, because this is real, this is raw, and this is disruptive.
**Unknown:** This is Integrative U Radio. Hey, everyone. Welcome back to another episode of Integrative U Radio. You have Dr.
**Unknown:** Nick and myself here today. For those of you on, uh, YouTube, he is... He is waving at you. And, uh, we have a really fun topic that was actually inspired by, uh, the pain that Dr.
**Unknown:** Nick was inflicting on my leg yesterday as he was, uh, he was working on me. Um, for those of you that don't know, I am, uh, about eight months pregnant, and, uh, my left leg is something that, uh, became problematic in my previous birth, where my entire left leg, uh, went numb during the birth. And then, go figure, I ended up, uh, giving birth in a standing position, essentially on one leg, while breaking Dr. Nick and our best friend, Dr.
**Unknown:** Kyle's, shoulders. So there's a lit- little backstory there. But we're being very, very proactive to make sure that that doesn't happen in this, uh, in this birth because... Especially since I'm getting so close.
**Unknown:** Uh, but we're in Italy, that's where we are currently living, and they have some pretty wild arnica products. And for those of you unfamiliar with arnica, it's a homeopathic most commonly used for pain, discomfort, muscle aches. And what would you say, Nick, in the US, the normal percentage of, of arnica, you know, potency is what? It's been a while since I looked it up, but I mean, this is like- Like 10%, though?
**Unknown:** Yeah, yeah. This is 98, 99%. Yeah. And then what's interesting is then even when you look at the label of the ingredients, that 98, 99%, there was still some in Italy that had toxic ingredients- Mm ...
**Unknown:** which is kind of crazy. Um, so it's always about, you know, it's not what you do but how you do it that matters most. So this how instance is making sure that you're only putting quality in. 'Cause when you think about homeopathics, uh, when you mix it with something else, it, it actually changes the energy of it.
**Unknown:** Mm-hmm. Um, so arnica by itself, you're like, "Oh, this didn't work," but you actually weren't using the full potential of arnica when you're mixing that with other chemical ingredients. Uh, so you wanna get something as pure as possible so you can actually experience and receive all that arnica has to offer. Yeah.
**Unknown:** And, and arnica is something that you could take orally, but they also have topical versions of it. And so essentially, this, this podcast is about when patchwork can fuck up your life. And the... What got me thinking is I bought arnica, I bought an arnica topical gel, and I was using it on my leg, and yes, it 100% made my leg feel better.
**Unknown:** But because of the nature of what we do and the way we think- How long did it feel better? Well, ex- exactly. It was... I, I got through the night, um, with my leg being uncomfortable, and then the next day, you know, problem still, still persists.
**Unknown:** And I think in this day and age, this is a lot of people. A lot of people have aches and pains, uh, and they don't necessarily know what it stems from. But of course, we have all the reasoning. "Oh, I walked too long." "Oh, I twisted my ankle." "Oh, I slept wrong." So we normalize a lot of what we experience, and it's not just, you know, us doing it, it's everyone around us, so again, it, it further normalizes it.
**Unknown:** And the idea of finding the root cause is, is uncommon, and part of this is because of, of the programming from our upbringing, which we'll get into later. So the arnica is something that I used, but I asked Dr. Nick, I was like, "Can you please work on my leg? Because I wanna deal with the root cause of it." And as he was working on my leg, I r- I started thinking about this idea of, of patchwork and how it applies to all the different avenues of life.
**Unknown:** And so obviously, he's working on my leg, and it was not the most comfortable. And getting to the root cause of different things in your life is usually not comfortable, which is one of the reasons why we avoid it. And I think we have been- Can I pause really quick? Yeah, sure.
**Unknown:** When you say working on your leg, most people are not gonna know what that means. Um- Oh, y- you were doing muscle work, you were adjusting my knee, making sure it was in alignment. You were working on, um, my hip flexors. So it was a combination of, you know, let's call it deep, intense muscle work.
**Unknown:** It's a lot more intricate than that, but for those of you that are, you know, not really gonna understand the verbiage, let's keep it simple. And then there was also an alignment factor, making sure that my low back-My tailbone and my hip joint were all in proper alignment in addition to my foot. So, you know, for those of you that have ever had a deep tissue massage or a lymphatic massage, you know that it doesn't always feel the best . And even afterwards, afterwards you have to have the expectation that you're gonna be sore, you need to drink a lot of water, and, you know, you need to make sure that, um, you're, you're clearing whatever was mobilized in that deep tissue work, hence why when you get a massage they always say, you know, drink a lot of water and, and make sure not to indulge too much in processed foods or, um, alcohol, et cetera.
**Unknown:** So it's not that the arnica didn't work, because it did, it just, it didn't resolve the issue which is why the pain come back. Pain is- And, yeah. And I think most people are not necessarily... Like, we can say, most people are gonna say, "Well, you used arnica, it's natural, it's healthy.
**Unknown:** You know, that's good. That's commendable," because other people are using Tylenol, acetaminophen, ibuprofen. They're us- or they're even using, um, stronger drugs like, uh, Percocet and fentanyl and, you know, uh, oxycodone, et cetera. Like, that is- W- but whether you use- ...
**Unknown:** that's the route ... whether you use something, quote-unquote, natural and healthy like arnica or something, in my mind, not healthy, um, like a designed chemical, if pain's coming back it's just showing you that you haven't resolved the issue. And we keep trying to kill the pain, but the pain's not the problem, it's just the messenger. Yeah.
**Unknown:** So this is going back to let's not patch the problems, let's fix it. But I also feel like there's this context that when we talk about this with the human body, for some reason we feel like it's okay to do that patchwork, or it's okay to postpone finding the root cause. But then when you f- when you talk about doing patchwork for your house or your car, for some reason there's a different dynamic happening psychologically. You know, if you have a hole in your roof and you have someone come in and do a, a shit job, they do a patchwork job.
**Unknown:** You know, they, they literally put a, a piece of plywood over it, essentially the problem's a little bit better but the problem still exists. And we logically know that that means that there is going to be animals that can get in our house. We know that that means, you know, different types of insects can create nests in our house. Water can come into our house and then create a mold problem and make our family sick.
**Unknown:** All of those things make logical sense for people. Same thing with your car. If you have a hole in your gas tank and someone goes and puts a piece of paper over it or some duct tape, you know that you're gonna be in deep shit. You know?
**Unknown:** Essentially your car can explode. Your car can stop on the side of the road. You know, you can get into an accident because of dysfunction because the gas is leaking into the engine, et cetera. And so we can logically understand the ramifications of patchwork in some of these practical parts of life, but for some reason we think we're exempt when it comes to the human body.
**Unknown:** And- Yeah, it's pretty interesting that you used the symbolism of a house and a car because your house is your home and your body's your home. And- Yeah. ... and, but some people take better care of their cars than their body, but your body is, is your actually vehicle to be able to do...
**Unknown:** even to use an inside car I didn't do that on purpose, by the way. I was listening and I was like, "There's some good analogies there." Um, so for some people, you know, on the human behavior, you're not gonna take action until you can link how it's gonna serve you. So it's just that simple instance that, hey, just check in really quick. Are you taking better care of your house than your actual home, your body, your mind, everything?
**Unknown:** Or are you taking better care of your car, your vehicle, your truck, your SUV, whatever it is, your motorcycle- Mm-hmm ... better than you're taking care of your body? And let's just make it a fair exchange. You know, you don't have to take less care of one, you just, let's put that much love and care and TLC into yourself.
**Unknown:** Well, and I think that that is very easy to say, but people will still tend to put themselves on the back burner, and that's kind of the, the point that we wanna drive home today i- is talking a little bit more in depth about the parts that we might not have in our actual awareness. You know, I know you've heard me say it a million times, and this was a phrase or a concept that I learned in business, and it was conflict avoided is conflict multiplied. And for those of you, when it comes to the people side of life, if you take a moment and think about this idea, if there was an issue and you just avoided it and, and didn't speak up or didn't address it or didn't have a conversation, that conflict, if it was an internal conflict or an external conflict, that got bigger. And it could get bigger because of the story that gets created.
**Unknown:** It can get bigger because the problem isn't resolved. It can get bigger that eventually it's like the emotional turmoil of stuffing it away, and then there's boom, blow up, fight. It could be a year later, it could be 10 years later. We've all experienced that, and we've experienced it...
**Unknown:** If you are an entrepreneur, you've 100% experienced it in your business. If you see something that isn't working and you just were too busy to deal with it, that problem became bigger. That employee issue became bigger, and eventually resulted in a, uh, you know, non-amicable departure. It, it happens in marriages in reality.
**Unknown:** Well, the... I would say the... I wouldn't say sad, but the hard part about it is is that, you know, when we avoid things for so long, we're, we're just constantly going to the n- next problem, the next fire that we avoided weeks, months, years earlier. And then it's like, "Oh, shit, I'm just going to the next fire, and I'm gonna go to the next fire," because we avoided so much.
**Unknown:** So, you know, initially sometimes it can-Take a decent amount of effort, energy, and work because we do need to do a certain degree of patchwork sometimes, um, to be able to give us the space to really work on the true problem. But, you know, if, if you don't have that space, then you just gotta deal with the pain and, and take a couple steps backwards and deal with that causation because you're never gonna get out of that circus of problem, problem, problem, problem. So- But I think that's the other point that I wanna make is that I think this, this is very, very, very much built into culture. And, and we live in Italy now, we lived in the US our whole lives, and it's everywhere.
**Unknown:** It's not just the US. But there's this idea that you... things should be fast, cheap, and easy. And we live in a world of convenience.
**Unknown:** Don't get me wrong, the world of convenience is very, very, very prevalent in the US, hence why there's fast food on every single corner. There are drive-throughs for your pharmaceutical drugs. Like, you know, we have delivery. We have how many, you know, of those apps now from Uber Eats and whatever else.
**Unknown:** Like, there is a massive driver for convenience. Living in Italy, we have some levels of convenience depending on where you are, but nowhere near as much as the US. And so we're, we're built on this idea that things should be fast, cheap, and easy. And so then this is going to flow into the idea that things in life should be fast, quick, and easy, and this is a driver for this idea of patchwork.
**Unknown:** And so problem avoided is problem multiplied, and we need to get out of the fantasy that it's not gonna require some level of, of an investment or an asset in order to fix the problem. But exactly what you said is if you want to patchwork it or push it to the side altogether, the, the cost gets bigger. And I'm not talking about, like, the cost of the new roof on your house or the cost of the new leg you need. Yes, of course, there's that factor.
**Unknown:** But the thing is that people don't look at their time and their energy as a primary asset. We always look at money as an asset. And people are actively giving away their time and energy, which in my opinion is, is the most valuable asset. And so if you spend most of your days- Without time and energy, you can't enjoy your money, so...
**Unknown:** Well, 100%, and we're seeing that tremendously in people that are 50 and older. You know, people that are, are retiring and they're not enjoying their money. They're, they're going and dealing with all the health problems that they either patchworked or ignored altogether. And, you know, they're not spending their years on...
**Unknown:** at the yacht club or the golf course. Like, it's... If you really take a step back and start looking at the people around you or, or the people that you know that retired or your fri- your parents' friends, whatever. There are s- there are so many people going into retirement and immediately going into some type of health crisis, and a lot of them passing away within 10 years of retirement.
**Unknown:** It's, it's a very, very alarming statistic. If, um, just doing, you know, a tidbit on one of our previous podcast. We always talked about the balance. So if you're curious of learning the balance about this, we talked about the younger generations, um- Yeah ...
**Unknown:** enjoying their time and energy without the money. Um, so there's always a, a co-balance, a co-learning, but health and, uh, true... The true authentic experience of life is in the middle. Um, so we gotta manage both equally, but that was just a little tag for a previous podcast.
**Unknown:** Yeah, no, it, it's... Well, that's the thing is, is we're generation to generation it's been so different, and the Gen Z-ers to the, to the Boomers, it, it's such a stark difference the way they think about life. No one's right or wrong, um, but they're the seesaw. You know, the, the work hard and hustle for your whole life.
**Unknown:** We're going the master's life. And the re- we say this is the bigger awareness we can have, the, the better questions we'll develop, which will give us more clarity, more congruent answers, allowing us to take better action so that we can just live our best life. You know, not being polarized from one view to the next. Yes.
**Unknown:** But let's just see the big picture and make the best, most efficient decisions going forward. Well, I think it's moving out of judgment and moving into awareness and understanding. You know, there's a lot of people, even Millennials, that are judging the Gen Z-ers. And, you know, don't get me wrong, there were times, especially as a business owner, when I was like, "Wait, what did you just ask me?" Like- And, uh, because, you know, we're old- the old Millennials, so we're, we're actually m- closer to the mindset of the Boomers.
**Unknown:** And, uh, but when you, when you zoom out, you're like, "Oh, they watched all of us. They watched all of us work so frigging hard, burn ourselves out, and not have quality of life." And they said, "Nope, don't want that." Well, it's even interesting, like, you go back to that programming of fast, cheap, and easy, especially in the US, but it's, it's been everywhere. Um, you know, it's why the medical system is designed the way it is 'cause it's a patchwork. It's fast.
**Unknown:** I don't know if I would say it's cheap, depending on what country you're in. Yeah. And it's easier. But when you do that, when you learn that, you know, fast food, everything-It, it's designed to get you on to the next moment.
**Unknown:** And when you're constantly looking for the next moment, A, you're not being present, so you're missing out on life, which creates distress. Any time that we're either mentally, you know, back in the past thinking or in that future kind of desire aspect, we're, we're missing out on life, and that's the aging process. You know, the whole aging process is, is, is a distress, and the distress comes from not being present because when we're, when we're present, we're actually taking in, we're experiencing, we're allowing, and there's really no force, um, on us when we're in the present moment. But any time we get out of that moment, you know, and based on also the intensity of the emotion that's attached to that past or to the present, um, that's what's, that's what's...
**Unknown:** That's a huge part of creating the, the, the force, the distress onto the body which, you know, creates breakdown and creates symptoms and creates pain, and then we go into that patchwork. Yeah. You know? So what's fun about that is, like you said, is looking bigger of, you know, I'm having some physical symptoms in my body, but I know that my body is more than just a body.
**Unknown:** It's also, you know, really dictated by the mind. So let's look at what's the mind trying to tell my, my left hip and my left leg, left leg. You know, what's that attached to? Oh, that's also left side of the body is attached to that right brain, more of the feminine, more of the creation.
**Unknown:** That left leg is taking us into what? Well, that's how I can either walk forward in life typically- Mm-hmm ... that whole left aspect. So it's like, okay, where, where am I either holding myself back in that creative aspect of moving forward in my life or that's just the breaks, but also maybe of am I missing something to also really help pull me forward?
**Unknown:** Yep. You know, am I missing something that's gonna really inspire me on this creative part of life? So it's looking in, in both directions of the past, what's holding me back, in the future, what can I connect with to increase that desire, not holding on, but collapsing both so that I love what that pain gave me. It gave me the awareness to tap into something that I'm even more creative and inspired about, that gave me the awareness of what's holding me back.
**Unknown:** And when I can use both of that negative and positive information, that's when you become empowered. That's when you become powerful, and that's when you can use that power to serve yourself, which is self-love, and that's the gift that patchwork doesn't offer. Well, yeah. And, and that's the thing is this is going back to the idea of really thinking outside of the box, and this is, you know, w- things that we've developed over the past decade that we've been working in, in practice and working with people is, you know, you can look at me logically and say, you know, "You have a baby and your belly is ginormous at this point at eight months pregnant-" "...
**Unknown:** so that's the problem with your, with your left leg." Mm-hmm. But then, you know, you can then take the step back just looking from the physical perspective and say, "Well, why the left and not the right?" Oh, well, the baby's position, blah blah blah blah blah. You can have all of the logical reasons for it, but there are certain scenarios where the physical work won't work for the person, and this is, this is why we've become investigators in our practice is if someone comes to me and says, "I have X problem. I've done this, this, this, this," and all of those things were physical and biochemical.
**Unknown:** They took supplements. They did detox therapies. They did stem cells. They did all of that.
**Unknown:** Now we have to look beyond that because what are we gonna do, recreate the wheel? We're gonna give different supplements. We're gonna do different therapies. We're gonna do different detox.
**Unknown:** I don't know. Maybe. But really at the end of the day is let's go down the road that nobody else explored. You know, w- what are the...
**Unknown:** Or, or were there any major life events or stressors leading up to the onset of what you're experiencing? So this is a really cool thing a- about, you know, m- thinking outside of the box when it comes to the human body and thinking outside of the idea of patchwork. And as we're wrapping this up, there's, there's two major things that I want you to walk away with. I wanna give you a couple additional examples of this idea of patchwork because I gave you the examples with the house, but how does this actually apply to you, your health, your family, your relationships?
**Unknown:** And then of course we wanna give you some solutions. But w- this idea of patchwork, I don't think that many people will think this is patchwork. Surgery, medication, even certain forms of, of psychological therapy can be patchwork. It's an after the fact.
**Unknown:** It's a react- it's a reactivity opposed to a proactivity. And if you're not dealing with root cause, then you know that it's patchwork. And then even, too, couples therapy can be a form of patchwork. And, you know, parenting techniques that you're learning a- after the fact that your kid is rebellious and, uh, has an addiction problem can be patchwork.
**Unknown:** So we have to understand this, is that, you know, there is an opportunity to be proactive and not reactive. You know, I, I feel very fortunate that Nick and I... You know, well, two s- you could look at this two different perspectives. We were really busy with our business, and we put a family on hold.
**Unknown:** Some people can look at that as a negative.But we believe that everything happens the way that it's supposed to because our clinical experience played a very big role in our own personal development, which actually set us up with perfect timing to have a family. And I say that because we got into Dr. D- Demartini's work, and we started to really understand more about ourselves, about what we valued, who we are from the core of our character. And Nick and I realized, you know, hence why we were able to run a business together and not kill each other and also be, you know, together as, as romantic partners, is that we had a lot of alignment with our, our values.
**Unknown:** And so really what that meant is that when we come together as a couple and now have a child, we're very aligned with how we want to raise that child, the values we wanna instill in that child, quote, unquote, "The lessons we want them to learn," what we think makes them a quote, unquote, "good person," because everybody has a different definition of that. We were congruent with how we wanted to feed him, schooling, et cetera. How many people have a child, or even get a dog, and they realize, "Wow, we are so not on the same fucking page with anything," and it's because- One, one caveat there ... no one's ever talked about their values.
**Unknown:** Go ahead. One caveat there. It's... We do have a lot of values that overlap, I mean, based on- But we're so different.
**Unknown:** But, but we're also very, very, very different. And there are some of those differences between our values when you get down to the specifics of it. Mm. But this is part of what I wanna say.
**Unknown:** When she says aligned, she didn't mean that we have the same values. It's means that we've also taken the time not only to learn our values, each other's values, the family's values, but learn the alignment comes from learning how- Yeah, like the synchronization ... each, each specific individual's values are actually serving each other. Just because they're different doesn't mean an one's not...
**Unknown:** When one's getting served, the other one's not. That's, that's not alignment. That's disalignment. When everybody's getting served, when the family's getting served as well, that's alignment.
**Unknown:** Everybody, it's, it's, you know, the, what is it? The you can have your cake and eat it too. Every- everybody's winning. Mm-hmm.
**Unknown:** Yeah, no. I, I appreciate you clarifying that because that is an important point. You don't seek out someone who has the same values of you, of you. You, you seek out where there's alignment and opportunity to grow, and, and I think that the differences in our values, uh, really helped us grow in, in directions of our life that we wouldn't have grown i- if we were alone or with different partners.
**Unknown:** So that, there is a very big difference there. And so what we want you to think about is, okay, patchwork, I'm getting it. What parts of my life do I think that I'm possibly y- you know, patching? And, you know, if we want to, if we're like, "Oh, I don't know," thinking about this idea of fast, cheap, and easy, you know, where, where am I being resistant in putting in the time, the effort, or, or the, the monetary investment in order to fix the root of the problem?
**Unknown:** And also, where am I being reactive? I think this is a key question for a lot of people. Where am I being reactive versus proactive? Because in our experience, we've seen a lot of people come to us with health problems.
**Unknown:** There has not been, u- until more recently, there hasn't been tons of people that have come to us saying, "I wanna be proactive in my health." It was, "I wanna be... I need, I need to be reactive because I have a problem." And the same thing usually goes for, you know, a lot of people are not actively seeking out personal growth, uh, actively seeking out therapy. They're, they're doing this as a reactivity. So you have to understand, do not beat yourself up about this.
**Unknown:** We have been... This, this idea has been embedded in us based off of the, the culture and societal norms. You know, what is the saying? Um, don't fix it unless it's broke.
**Unknown:** Like, I grew up with that saying 100%. And I think about that, and, and it was something I heard a lot, not just my family, but other people, and I'm like, what a fuck dumb thing to say to kids. You know? Don't fix it until it's broke.
**Unknown:** You know, like, that is such a shit lesson, mindset. So i- it's, it's an interesting idea. But the other fantasy that I wanna break is that, one, stop thinking that problem-solving is easy. You know, this is why CEOs are paid so well.
**Unknown:** They're not paid well because they, you know, they're just sitting around in their big ass office. It's because they're the absolute best problem solvers, the most efficient problem solvers, and they are willing to have the hardest fucking conversations of anyone in the company. That is what makes a good CEO. So if you wanna be the leader of your family, if you wanna be a leader to your husband or your wife or your business, then you need to understand that problem-solving is a part of that.
**Unknown:** And, and I'm sorry, if you're a parent, you need to... You're a problem solver, end of story. Like, that's part of your job. So you need to open your level of awareness, and you need to understand and anticipate that you're going to be using your assets.
**Unknown:** If that's gonna be your time, your energy, or your finances, or a combination of them, that is a requirement to problem solve.They don't... There's no magic wand. I would say that constantly in my office. I'm like...
**Unknown:** People would come in, "Oh, wait, how long is this gonna take? Oh, how much is it gonna cost?" And I'm like, "Listen, there might be someone out there that has a magic wand. I don't have it. I'd be a lot richer if I did." I've got a magic wand.
**Unknown:** But maybe you could keep me posted. Go ahead. I've got a magic wand. Nick's like, "I have a magic wand." Of course you do.
**Unknown:** And I wasn't meaning that in the dirty way. I don't even know where you're going with that, but that's different. For my... For my pervert followers.
**Unknown:** That think just like you. And the last point that I- Mm ... wanna drive home is pay attention. Open your level of awareness.
**Unknown:** I... Listen, I... Trust me, Dr. Nick and I both know probably more, me more than Dr.
**Unknown:** Nick, I know what it's like to be so fucking busy that you, like, it... Your level of awareness is nonexistent because you're just so busy. You're just surviving. You're trying to just keep it all afloat.
**Unknown:** And when you're in that phase of life, and that phase of life can, trust me, it can persist 20, 30 years. It could persist 50 years. I was in it for at least 20 years. And y- you can't listen to the feedback of your body.
**Unknown:** You can't listen to the feedback of your, your mind. You can't even, you can't even comprehend the feedback of life. Like, constantly getting rejected or derailed or investments falling through. Like, these things are happening to reroute you, to say, "Fucking stop." I literally...
**Unknown:** I was so fucking stubborn that... Testardo they say in Italian. Testardo. And I was so stubborn that I would just be like, "I'll push through.
**Unknown:** I will overcome this," instead of pausing to say, "What is this telling me? How is this rerouting me?" So just, just try to keep that in mind. Being busy... I don't know about you guys, but the, the busyness level that I was for many, many years, when I really stopped to think about it, I never...
**Unknown:** I really don't think that the level of output ever resulted in the equal amount of received money, energy, time. It w- it was never necessarily the, the direct correlation of if I put this much out, I'm getting this much back, especially when you're in the chaotic, busy, burnout overwhelm. If you're- So- ... busy and thriving, different.
**Unknown:** Well, I mean, not necessarily, 'cause you could be thriving in one area of that, but killing yourself in another. Um, s- so I wanna... This has gone a little longer than we anticipated, but wrapping this up. Get a pen and pencil out, write this down, because awareness is a skill set, you know.
**Unknown:** It's not something that just comes naturally. You have to, you have to work at it. So an easy thing to increase your awareness on this is literally just have your journal, pad of paper, pen, and every day before going... every night before going to bed, literally just have two columns.
**Unknown:** One's proactive, the other side's reactive. And put in the top couple things that you were proactive in that day, and then put in the top couple things that you were reactive that day. And next to reactive, I want you to put into parentheses, energy out. You know, Nicole was saying how she gave and gave and gave, but didn't equal that receiving.
**Unknown:** Well, the proactive, that's energy in. So for you to be able to see that this is what you did that was proactive that day, that was what you're reactive, and then you can easily see that, "Oh my God, this energy out was so much more than energy in. If I continue this process, the universe, my body, everything's gonna be breaking down. I'm gonna have a lot more chaos.
**Unknown:** Life is gonna fucking suck." So the goal is to have a balance, energy out to energy in. And when we're in that balance, that's where we're talking about having the power. So you wanna go through and constantly be looking at where you were reactive and constantly working on that. You're always gonna have things that you're reactive in, otherwise you're just in a total bliss of gratitude and love all day, which is impossible.
**Unknown:** Nobody's like that. So don't listen to the people that think that life is all good, because that's bullshit. Um, you're gonna constantly have proactive and reactive, but the goal is to balance it. Yeah.
**Unknown:** And, and this is based on the premise of fantasy to a nightmare. If you live in the one-sided world that everything is supposed to be great and, you know- Don't listen to those people. They're feeding you bullshit. Yeah, don't listen to those people, because it's not a realistic- Mm-mm ...
**Unknown:** expectation and it will create a nightmare for you. So we're here to ground you. Slap you a little bit. Like...
**Unknown:** Slap you around. Quit being a bitch. Stop the patchwork. Start being fucking proactive.
**Unknown:** Was that your, your Italian accent? That was my Italian. That's all I got. All right, guys, we hope you enjoyed.
**Unknown:** We'll see you on the next one. We thank you so much for being an avid listener of Integrative U Radio, formerly known as Integrative Wellness Radio. We appreciate all of your support. We love your comments.
**Unknown:** Please visit us on social media, as well as our website to see all of the fun things happening behind the scenes and the new amazing content and courses that is being rolled out on a monthly basis. We hope to see you there.
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About Integrative You Radio
Integrative You Radio is a root cause medicine and integrative medicine podcast hosted by Dr. Nicole Rivera and Dr. Nick Carruthers — two integrative doctors who build personalized wellness protocols from your DNA, minerals, hormones, gut, and nervous system rather than from a population template. Looking for an integrative doctor who reads your labs together instead of in isolation? This is the show.
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